In The Cards

When arriving in a new town, it nearly always pays off to check in at the local Guild, at least if you’re planning to stay a while. Such contacts can prove invaluable, as long as you manage to get a favorable reputation with the locals. Of course, it also pays off to make certain that nobody else is following you about and giving you a different reputation altogether. Particularly if said reputation involves very forthright imagery.

Excerpt from ‘Interview With An Assassin’

Imoen was practically bubbling with excitement. Once she had calmed herself after the Elminster incident her normally buoyant temper had reasserted itself. I’m sure he’ll forgive us once he has the time to calm down. And until then we’ll just have to avoid him.

The party had taken rooms at a nearby inn, the Elfsong Tavern. Imoen absolutely loved the place. It was dark and mysterious, with lots of shadowy figures hiding in the corners, and a general air of intrigue. Once they’d settled into their rooms they’d each had things to do. Zaerini and Edwin had walked off to investigate a nearby scroll shop, taking as much money as they could easily carry with them, and both of them looking very much like little children on Solstice Eve. Khalid and Yeslick had gone to get new supplies, and also to see about finding a proper map of the city. Jaheira kept muttering quietly to herself about ‘assaulting Elminster’ and ‘suicidal infants’ and had expressed an urgent need to pray for the continued survival of the party. Despite her requests, nobody had been interested in joining her.

That left Imoen, and she had promptly decided to investigate the immediate streets around the inn. So far it had been very satisfying. All these tall buildings…they almost make me dizzy. And all these people! She’d amused herself with picking a few pockets, as well as snatching some apples and candy off a passing vendor’s cart. Yep, this is the life. Rogues are made for the Big City, not for tromping around in forests or dungeons. Oh, there’s a pretty ring…got it. Aw, nuts. Just glass…you can’t trust anybody these days, not even people who look like wealthy merchants.

Imoen jumped on top of a merrily tinkling fountain and balanced along the edge, now and then standing on one leg in order to better exercise her sense of balance. She was getting slowly but steadily better, she knew that. Now all I need is to find myself a proper Thieves Guild and I’ll really be set. And of course a Thieves Guild would also be an excellent place to start looking for a certain somebody. She blissfully patted That Picture, lovingly tucked into one of her pockets. Hm, there’s an idea…

“’scuse me, ma’am!” Imoen cheerfully asked a matronly woman standing on her porch. The woman looked immensely tired, perhaps not surprising, since five children, all of them squabbling and runny-nosed, were tugging at her skirts while she was trying to sweep her doorstep. From inside the house one could hear a male voice calling out ‘Ellie, where’s my beer?’

“Excuse me, ma’am,” Imoen said again, holding up That Picture. “Have you seen him around here by any chance?”

The woman stared mutely at That Picture for about a minute. “No,” she eventually said, not taking her eyes off it. “But if you do find him, would you mind sending him over this way, dear? I could do with a trade-up.”

“Sorry,” Imoen said. “He’s my boy-friend, you see. But thanks for your time!” A few more attempts yielded similarly unsatisfactory results. Oh, poo. I’m probably asking in the wrong place. I really need to be asking around in a Thieves Guild of course. As long as I can find one.

“Pssst!” hissed a voice from out of a narrow alley. Imoen turned to see a skinny young man, a little older than her, and wearing clothes of dark gray and brown that more or less blended into the shadows. “'Ere, stop a moment,” he said. “I've got a word or two ye need to hear.”

“Hello,” Imoen said. “I’m Imoen. Who are you?”

“Er...my name’s Niklos. But that’s not important.” The young man tried to adopt a sinister look, but merely managed to look slightly cross-eyed. “Yer one o’ those mercenaries came into town earlier today, ain’t ya? Leas’ tha’s the word on the street. And I seen ya help yerself to some easy pickin’s earlier. If yer interested, then my boss would like a word with ya. He’s in the market for an outsider for a job or two. One who ain’t afraid to get his or her fingers a little dirty if ya know what I mean. He don't ask fer free though, and here be 50 gold just to hear him out.”

A Thieves Guild contact! This is great. And Rini would love it if I could get in there; I bet they know all sorts of things about what’s going on in the city. “Sure,” Imoen said. “I’ll come hear what he wants.”

“Good,” Niklos said, pointing at a narrow and rather dirty house a distance down the street. “It’s over there. This week’s password is ‘Bodhi’.” He paused. “No, wait. That was last week. This week it’s ‘Killer Bunny’.

Gee. Whoever made that up must have been either roaring drunk or really tired. “All right,” Imoen said. “See ya around.” She made her way to the anonymous house and walked up the stairs. There was nothing about the place that suggested anything out of the ordinary. Nothing, that is, until Imoen pulled the door open and was faced with a very large half-orc staring down at her with a perpetual snarl on his face. “Password?” he growled.

“Um…’Killer Bunny’?”

“Right. You can go in now.”

Yes! I’m in! Imoen passed through another door and then looked about herself with great interest. She was in a long low room, rather dark and grimy. Some chairs and tables stood here and there in the corners, and people were sitting talking to each other quietly, while others drifted about the room in small groups or lounged along the walls. In one corner she could spot a few young thieves taking turns practicing pick pocketing skills on a dummy weighted down with a large number of small bells. Now and then one of the thieves would be too clumsy, a bell would ring, and he would let one of the others take over. In another spot there was a dark-skinned young woman at a small stand, and some sort of commerce seemed to be going on. Probably a fence. But now to find this ‘Ravenscar’ person. Imoen scanned the crowd, hoping to catch sight of a familiar face. Aw, no sign of Adahn. Too bad. Still, he’s bound to pop in here sooner or later.

Secure in this happy thought, Imoen walked over to see what items the dark young woman, whose name turned out to be ‘Black Lily’, was offering. Having selected a nice new set of lock picks, and a superior kit for disarming traps, she once again displayed That Picture and made her inquiry.

“Oh my,” Black Lily said, an amused smile on her face. “How lovely. Yes, I’ve seen that one about. Not…in quite that position unfortunately, but I’ve seen him.”

“You have! Oh, that’s wonderful! Where? When? What was he up to? What did he say? Did he mention me? Does he miss me a lot?”

“Oh, he last came by maybe ten days or so ago, that I know of. Bought a few odds and ends, but I couldn’t say what his business was. He doesn’t strike me as the type to enjoy small talk. And no, he made no mention of you.”

“Oh.” Imoen’s face fell a little. “Well, I guess he wouldn’t. Like you said, he doesn’t really do small talk.” Her face brightened again. “Thanks for your help. If you see him again, can you please let him know I’m looking for him?”

“Of course.” Black Lily smiled again. “Once you do catch him, how about splitting the winnings?”

Imoen continued circling the room, passing by a scruffy-looking plain-faced man who was actually shorter than she was. He was apparently telling a story to a couple of fellow thieves, both of who were laughing heartily. “So I's at daggers drawing with him, an he drops the swag an runs!” the man said, chuckling. “Me stomach's in cupboard till season end, gold wise.” Then he turned his head to see Imoen, and a shrewd glint leaped into his eyes. “Ere now, I know of you. New sneaksmen ye be, though I canna see no need. Alatos need but look at home fer to find a dab at thievery. Mahaps we be testing yer talent, 'for ye rank riders bungle the score. Ye up to me task?”

Imoen had a basic understanding of what the man was trying to say, and for a moment she wondered whether she ought to answer the same way. She wasn’t sure she could pull it off without giggling though. “I could steal your back teeth without you feeling a thing,” she boasted. “Sure I’m up to it. Er…what do you want me to do anyway?”

The man grinned, revealing that said back teeth were in a terrible state of all-out rot. “Good,” he said. “We'll spy yer talent soon enough. Ye but need to keep an eye this first night. I and Rededge will command the taking. The mark be a noble house, aside the Splurging Sturgeon. Gold to split thrice amongst, followed soon by new mark if ye please. Up to the deed?”

Keeping watch shouldn’t be a problem, Imoen thought. And it’ll get me in properly with these thieves, I’m sure. “I’ll do it,” she said in her firmest voice.

The thief nodded, looking pleased. “There's the larcenous fire burnin'! We meet at dusk astride the Sturgeon, and bring only yerself in darks. Yer group will naught but get the watch nervous. I’m Narlen Darkwalk, by the way. There’ll be good profit in this, to be sure.” He drifted away out the door, leaving Imoen behind. A real burglary, the pink-haired girl thought with great excitement. I can’t wait to tell Adahn about this, I’ll make sure to impress him with my stealth and cunning and the way I…er…keep watch. And after this I’m sure I’ll move on to bigger and better things.

Satisfied with this the pink-haired girl started asking around for Alatos ‘Ravenscar’, and was eventually shown into a backroom. The guild leader turned out to be a blond man in his forties, with a long face and unreadable eyes. A wizard, a quiet man who said little but listened intently to everything that was said, accompanied him. It turned out that the wizard was no less than a mage from the mysterious land of Halruua, where magic was about as common as sand or rocks, and in town on a very particular errand. Apparently a local mage by the name of Shandalar had discovered the spell that kept the Halruuan skyships afloat in the air, and was preparing to sell it to one of the Grand Dukes of Baldur’s Gate. The Halruuans naturally wanted to keep their secret for themselves, and wanted the rare spell components necessary to be removed from Shandalar’s possession. At the moment the wizard’s three daughters, who were staying at the estate of a local nobleman, awaiting the transaction, were keeping them. The Halruuan was prepared to pay well for their return. Unfortunately most of ‘Ravenscar’s’ really good burglars had been swept up by a recent wave of arrests made by the Flaming Fist.

Now this task was a bit more challenging than Narlen’s, but it meant getting the favor of the very head of the Thieves Guild. “How long do I have to do this?” Imoen asked.

“Ten days,” Alatos ‘Ravenscar’ said. “That’s when the buy will take place. You’ll get paid as much as you can carry, you know. Of course, I’ll get even more, having negotiated the deal, but you won’t regret it.”

“Right,” Imoen said, trying to strike an impressive and mysterious pose, and wishing that she could look a little more intimidating. “I’ll do it.” A break-in in the home of a powerful wizard. If that doesn’t impress Adahn I don’t know what will.

Once Imoen left the Guild, the sun was beginning to set, and once she had found the Splurging Sturgeon it was well and truly dark. Narlen Darkwalk awaited her, and was pleased to see her turn up. “Now we're up to the business!” the thief said, once he had guided Imoen to a wealthy-looking house a few streets away from the inn. “Keep to the shadows and the watch will be blind to our sneak. You will spy the road while Rededge an I plunder within. Be on yer cautions and yell the warnin' if ye see the soldierman. I'd no fight 'em if I was you, just call the call and make for the dark. If they give chase, ye fade to black an keep quiet. Never known a guard to spot a thief scared to hiding. Stand from here while we two are off and in. We'll be back before the gold knows it's ours.” Not having drawn breath at all during these instructions, the thief fiddled with the lock on the door for a moment and disappeared inside.

“Um…all right,” Imoen faintly said, feeling a little stunned. The time seemed to drag by as she watched and waited, waited and watched. She hoped the thieves hadn’t decided to fall asleep inside the house or something. Or slip out a backdoor and leave me here. Nah, they wouldn’t do that. Would they?

The street was very dark by now, but when the soldier turned up Imoen still had no trouble spotting him. Dressed in the armor of the Flaming Fist, he clomped noisily down the street, sounding like a whole ironworks out for a walk. Imoen had planned to keep hidden and hope that he’d bypass her and her fellow thieves entirely, but unfortunately her hood caught on an old nail sticking out of the wall, displaying her vividly pink hair. “You there!” the soldier called out. “What are you doing, sneaking about like that!”

Aw, nuts and nutmash. Nothing to do but to run for it. “Eeeee!” Imoen screamed at the top of her voice. “Soldiers! I’m so badly scared of soldiers! I have to RUN!” Then she sprinted off down the street, the Flaming Fist hot on her heels. Unfortunately, her yell had alerted not only her fellow thieves, but also a whole patrol of Flaming Fist, and now all of them were coming after her. Imoen had a dreadful suspicion that they were doubling up on her and about to cut her path off. I bet this sort of thing never happens to Adahn. What can I do? And then she spotted a convenient drainpipe, and a ledge above it leading onto a slanting rooftop. That could work. Not having the luxury of stopping to think, the young thief scrambled up the building, her fingers and lungs aching with the exertion as she pulled herself onto the roof. There were arrows whistling through the air around her now. Gotta get out of here fast! The next rooftop wasn’t all that far off. She could make it. Probably.

Wishing that she dared close her eyes, Imoen ran as fast as she could towards the edge of the roof, and then jumped. I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die…

As it happened, she didn’t die. She even reached the second rooftop. Unfortunately, this second rooftop was of a less sturdy nature than the first one. Imoen tried to grab hold of something, but it was too late. The impact of her landing made bricks and wood crack and splinter beneath her feet, and with a scream of terror she went straight through the roof.

THUD. Imoen landed on something reasonably soft, considering herself very fortunate that she didn’t seem to have broken anything important. Well, apart from that roof, of course. But she seemed to be in one piece. Now to find out where she was. She seemed to be inside a small and rather dingy bedroom, sparsely furnished. There were a couple of chairs, a rickety table, a cracked mirror on the wall. Finally there was a somewhat lumpy bed that she was currently lying on. And then she saw the room’s second inhabitant and her heart tried to flutter straight out of her chest with excitement and joy.

He was standing on the other side of the room, and had apparently just been in the process of getting either dressed or undressed, treating Imoen to a mouthwatering display of bare chest, flat and hard, and with just the right amount of muscles. Yummmmm… There was the tiniest look of shock on his sharp face, and his black eyes were wary, but very focused. It seemed he’d had the time to grab a weapon, for he was standing with his arm half-raised, the faint moonlight in the room glinting off the throwing dagger in his right hand. I love that pose…well, apart from the ‘deadly threat’ part. But it makes him look extra handsome. And he’s wearing those divinely snug black leather pants! Would you just look at those hips! And that…

Adahn blinked, and seemed to recognize her. “What,” he said in a very level voice, “are you doing in my bed? And what did you do to my roof?”

Imoen grinned, feeling herself blush brightly. “Um…hi there, Adahn!” she beamed. “I…just thought I’d drop by to see ya, that’s all.” Then she promptly fainted, still with a wide smile on her face.