It’s rather nice to for once have somebody else be the one with the prophecy and the nutty people coming after him. Not that I’d want to share my boyfriend with him or anything, but I’m happy to let him take some of the pressure off of me.
Excerpt from ‘Ruminations Of A Master Bard’
“It’s not as if we could have known,” Zaerini was saying, and she gave Valygar an encouraging look. “It was just an accident.”
“An accident. We have all engaged in cannibalism ‘by accident’.” I was cursed already. Will this mean a second one, I wonder?
“Not all of us,” Jaheira said, smiling a slightly smug smile. “But the child is right, you did not know. There is no need to blame yourself.”
Anomen, who had been kneeling on the floor, praying fervently, finally opened his eyes. “Helm at least has not turned his face away from me,” he said, and his voice was filled with relief. “I believe he understands that we were mislead.”
“Of course he does,” Jaheira agreed. “Only a great fool would ever think any of you had done it on purpose.”
“Thank you, my lady,” Anomen said with a smile, bowing to the druid. “Your faith in me will inspire me to deeds which will purge my soul of this inadvertent sin, I am sure of it.”
“That’s not the kind of purging I would prefer,” Edwin muttered from his position on the floor, where he was curled up in a ball of misery, his head resting on his lover’s lap. “To think that such a thing should ever cross my lips. (If Auntie Poppy should ever hear about this I don’t want to think about what she would say.)”
Minsc scratched his bald head thoughtfully. “Boo says we were eating little evil halflings. Is that true?”
“Well, yes,” Zaerini admitted. “Only by accident, mind you.”
“Oh, Minsc doesn’t mind so much. They were Evil halflings before, but now they’re filling the tummies of Heroes of Goodness, making us strong and sturdy to kick lots more evil butts!”
“Well…yes, I suppose so. Just don’t start eating everybody we kill, all right?”
“Not even Evil Red Wizards?”
“No! Absolutely not. And now I think we should we go on.”
“So we should, your Worship,” said Jan, who was sitting perched on the shoulders of the giant golem that was standing in the middle of the room. He was poking about inside the hole where its head should have been, pulling at what seemed to be a length of wire. “Now, I’ve examined this fellow carefully, and my Gnomish expertise eye for machinery tells me that he’s currently lacking…”
“An arm and a head,” Edwin commented, hauling himself to his feet. “Took you some time to notice those little details, did it?”
“Oh, and coal,” Jan went on, ignoring him. “Apparently this thing is powered by it, strange as it seems. We’ll need to feed the furnaces in the next room.”
“And I think I saw a golem arm lying about in one of the first rooms we passed,” Zaerini mused. “Serves me right…I should have known to pick it up, seeing that it was apparently worthless junk, it was bound to come in handy somehow. I’ll just go back and fetch it. Besides, I want to check on Softy. She’s been an awful long time.”
“Then I’m coming with you,” Edwin immediately stated. “There could be more of those curries…I mean halfings.”
The bard winked. “Sure thing, Eddie. And maybe in the meantime, maybe the rest of you could search this place for any spare heads? We won’t be long.”
It could have been Valygar’s imagination, but as the pair walked out, he thought he heard the wizard murmuring something that sounded like ‘we’ll just see about that.’
The remaining adventurers divided into groups, with Anomen and Jaheira getting to work on the furnaces, Jan keeping on his examination of the golem, and Valygar and Minsc foraging ahead in search of spare heads. Beyond the furnace room, there was a long and narrow corridor in scenic military gray.
“You know, friend Valygar,” Minsc said as they walked along, “Boo says that you are not the same as before.”
Valygar turned his head to look into his fellow ranger’s round and innocent eyes. “Is that so?” he asked. I couldn’t possibly guess what he means by that, but I’m sure I won’t like hearing it.
“Yes. But you don’t have to worry, it is not the Stench of Evil needing to be swept away by the Airfreshener of Heroism. Also, there is no spoon. Boo says you want to remember that.”
Valygar looked around. The corridor certainly seemed spoon free to him. ”Spoon?” he asked, and there was a slightly brittle edge to his voice. “What spoon?”
“Don’t be silly, there is no spoon,” Minsc sagely replied, patting him on the back. “Boo just said so, remember? But don’t worry about not seeing the full wisdom of Boo’s words in the same way I do. That takes practice.”
“Right,” Valygar muttered. “No spoon. Practice. Of course.” He found himself trying to shake of the feeling that the world was just an insane illusion, conjured by some sinister creature for the purposes of cruel entertainment, and that the illusion was beginning to crack at the edges. I need to get out here. It feels as if my mind is melting.
By now, the corridor came to an end in front of a stylishly ocean-gray metal door. Wishing to finish any cutlery-based small talk, Valygar quickly pulled it open, and then stepped inside. The room he entered was a round, prison-gray chamber, with a quietly humming metal pillar in the middle. Standing with its back to the pillar was a large golem. It was about half again as tall as Valygar himself, humanoid with angular, surly and vaguely elven features. It was wearing a black suit, and had on a pair of dark-tinted glasses. As Valygar approached, there was an increase in the intensity of the buzzing sound, the door behind him slammed shut and the golem’s head turned towards him. It yanked a thick cord out from the socket in the back of its head.
“Welcome to the Sphere, Mr Corthala,” it stated in a toneless voice. “You may call me Agent Rondel. Think you are the One, do you?”
“The one what?” Valygar suspiciously asked, placing a hand on the hilt of his katana.
The golem was silent for a few seconds, processing this. “If you do not know, you will die,” it said. “But you are asking the wrong question. What you should be asking is ‘what is the Sphere’.”
“An interdimensional transportation device built by my insane and undead ancestor.”
“Well, yes. That too. Not quite the answer I was looking for, mind. So, red or blue?”
“What?”
The golem gave him a look that was almost pitying. “Bit slow, aren’t we, Mr Corthala?” it asked. “If you go with ‘blue’, you will be cryogenically frozen and made to forget everything bad that ever happened to you, while you become nourishment for my constructor.”
“Nice. And red?”
Agent Rondel’s mouth twisted into an unpleasant smile. “Then, Mr Corthala, we fight, and the walls of this chamber are painted red with what might be tastelessly referred to as your ‘crimson lifefluid’. Now…MAKE YOUR CHOICE.”
Valygar smoothly eased the katana out of its scabbard, and nodded briefly to the golem. “If you want my blood – then work for it.”
“Yes!” Minsc shouted, drawing his own sword. “Bad golem man is all half-baked, time to put him BACK IN THE OVEN!”
The Rashemani ranger charged heedlessly ahead, intent on slaughter, but his head was met with a rock-hard arm, thrust out too swiftly for a human eye to follow. There was a nasty ‘clonk’ sound, and the large man toppled to the floor with a grunt. He didn’t get up again.
“Tut tut, Mr Corthala,” the golem said. “No interference. You and I alone, as it was meant to be.” It stalked towards Valygar, fists raised, and then it struck again. Valygar just barely had time to see a blur in the air before one of those iron fists hit his side and he was thrown hard against the wall. From the cracking noise and the intense pain, he guessed that at least one rib had to be broken.
Fast. He’s too fast. Can’t win.
But still, he had to try. What other choice was there? He raised the katana again, forcing himself into an attack. The golem sidestepped him with ridiculous ease, and spun its leg out in a swift kick. Valygar grunted as his legs were swept out from under him, and he hit the floor.
“You are not The One,” Agent Rondel scornfully said. “If you were, you would know how to meet my challenge blow for blow. You…you are a mere meatbag, fit only to be fodder. Now die.”
The golem raised its leg, preparing to stomp down hard on Valygar’s head, squashing it like a ripe fruit. Valygar looked up at him, expecting to die. No! Can’t die…have to kill Lavok. Have to. I am the last.
And something burst open inside of him, something that had been lying in wait, curled up like a butterfly waiting to emerge from its chrysalis. It spread through him, infusing him with no energy.
Have to move. Have to move fast.
The world blurred around him as he sprang to his feet. Rondel’s foot missed him, cracking the floor open. The golem tugged at its leg, which had got stuck inside the hole it had made.
“So,” it said, eyes narrowing. “You do know something, after all.”
No time to think. No time to wonder. Time only to react. Valygar dodged a blow that could easily have taken his head off, then another, and another, moving so swiftly that he nearly made himself dizzy. Another kick, and he leapt into the air, evading it. The two opponents circled each other, and now Agent Rondel’s smirk had been replaced by a scowl.
“Good at dodging, are you?” it said. “Dodge this.” It raised its hand, and Valygar just had time to see a long, metal object pointing directly at his face before there was a deafening boom. Small, shiny metal objects were heading towards him, crawling through the air. Fast as he was, he knew there would be no time to avoid them. And then, he knew.
I don’t have to.
With utter calm, Valygar raised his hand, his palm towards the bullets. There was another surge, deep inside, a rush of joy that threatened to overwhelm him, and then a sound that reminded him of rain falling. Looking down, he saw the bullets pattering to the metal floor. All except one, that was. That one bounced against the force emanating from him, and recoiled. Agent Rondel just had time to give Valygar a very surprised look before it buried itself deep within his left eye. There was a crackling sound, a shower of electric sparks, and the golem went down with a large crash. Moments later, Valygar sank to his knees beside his defeated opponent, his entire body shaking as the momentousness of what had happened began to sink in. The joy had passed now, leaving utter dread and revulsion behind.
That…was magic. I did magic. Mother…father…what have I done? He retched dryly, wishing he could rewind the past few minutes and…and do what? What else could he have done? Magic. Oh mother…what have I become?
Next: Valygar tries to cope.
