Cards Reshuffled

The important things that happen to an adventurer aren’t always the monster-hacking, Evil Overlord toppling, World-saving stuff. Sometimes, the things that happen in between the fights are just as important, and will affect just as much.

Excerpt from ‘Ruminations Of A Master Bard’

There were some more trolls ambling about in the corridors of the bottom floor of Keep De’Arnise, but they didn’t seem too well organized, and the adventurers managed to fight them off without sustaining any serious injuries themselves. Once they were reasonable certain that there were no more trolls in the immediate vicinity they decided to rest for an hour or so before going on. They paused in the main reception room, a large hall where banners hung on the walls and empty suits of armor stood in the corners. At one end there were some chairs, one of them larger and more impressive than the others. Nalia explained that this was the place where her father would conduct formal business as lord of this land.

“So let me get this straight, Nalia,” Zaerini asked the younger woman as they sat resting side by side, leaning against the wall. “We’re trying to find your father, yes?”

“Yes?”

“And your father has been taken into these dungeons…pardon me, ‘cellars’ of yours.”

“Yes?”

“And these ‘cellars’ can only be accessed from the top floor of the castle, via a secret passage accessible only through your Aunt’s bedroom?”

“Yes?”

“Well, doesn’t that sound just a little bit strange to you?”

Nalia looked a little blank. “No…why?”

“Well, doesn’t your Aunt object to people going tromping through her bedroom whenever they want to…to fetch some wine or apples from the cellars or whatever?”

Nalia suddenly giggled. “Sorry…” she said. “It’s just…that if you’d ever met Auntie Delcia you wouldn’t need to ask that question. “Auntie is a very…formidable woman. And outspoken. People tend to do as she says. Anyway, we don’t really use the ‘cellars’, the passage is normally closed and locked.”

“Yes, but why build it that way in the first place?”

“Well,” Nalia said, lowering her voice to a conspiratorial whisper, “some of my ancestors weren’t…very nice. They didn’t understand about how important it is to help people, like I do. And I’m told that the first Lady De’Arnise was very fond of the…the ‘cellars’ and liked to go down there in the middle of the night sometimes. I’ve seen a portrait of her, she wore this spiky leather thing and was carrying a whip.”

“Oh,” Rini said, thinking about it. “Yes, I suppose that explains a lot. Your Aunt doesn’t carry a whip, I hope?”

Nalia shook her head. “No.”

“Well, that’s good to hear.”

“She doesn’t really need one. Though she does like to carry a riding crop, she says it keeps the servants more alert, which isn’t really very enlightened of her I think.”

“Oh, good. I can’t wait to meet her…” Though I’m starting to hope the trolls will meet her before I do. Maybe she’d make them choke.

“I’m not sure even the trolls would dare offend Auntie Delcia,” Nalia said, echoing the bard’s thoughts. “I am worried about Father though…if…if something were to happen to him…” She swallowed heavily and then looked away, trying to keep her face under control. Rini felt her heart go out to the younger woman. Nalia might have some annoying traits, but this she could sympathize with.

“I know,” she said in a kind voice, handing Nalia a handkerchief. “I…lost my father, Gorion, not all that long ago. I hope we’ll be able to save yours.”

“Thank you,” Nalia said, smiling faintly as she dabbed at her eyes.

“Ladies? Might I be allowed to join you for some pleasant conversation and repose?” Zaerini looked up to see Anomen standing close by. The squire had apparently used the resting period to not only polish his armor until it gleamed like the sun, but to groom his beard and comb his hair until the brown curls gleamed almost as much as the armor did. A stray beam of sunlight entering through the small windows under the roof gleamed off white teeth as he smiled. It’s funny…he’s just as much into grooming as Eddie is, isn’t he? But he seems to be taking more and more pains with it, I wonder why that is?

Oh, I don’t know, Softpaws said from her resting place in the bard’s lap. Maybe he’s trying to make an impression on somebody.

Maybe…but don’t you think Nalia is a little young for him?

The cat’s sigh was filled with exasperation and she rose and wandered off, looking quite annoyed.

“Sure Anomen,” Rini said. “Go ahead.”

“I’ll just…er…just go see what Minsc is doing,” Nalia hurriedly said. “I feel like…like petting Boo a little. Yes, that’s it.” She hurriedly got to her feet and left.

“Thank you for granting me the pleasure of your company, my lady,” the cleric said as he sat down. “I could not help but overhear you mentioning Gorion…I understand that he was very much like a father to you. What was your relationship with him like?”

The half-elf thought about this for a few moments, memories whirling through her head. Gorion telling stories, marvelous stories about monsters and magic. Gorion comforting her when she had fallen from a tree and scraped her knee, wiping her tears away. Gorion surprising her on her birthday, gifting her with a small violin. Gorion patiently listening when she practiced on said violin, despite the fact that it sounded like a cat getting strangled. Gorion’s arms, comforting her at night when the nightmares came, nightmares of blood and murder. “He was the best father I could have wished for,” she said, her voice a little choked. “A wonderful man. I’ll always miss him.”

Anomen nodded, and though he was smiling there was a darkness in his blue eyes, something old and sad. “Ah, I see,” he said. I must admit, my lady, that I am rather jealous of you. My own father, Lord Cor, is nothing like your Gorion and he and I did not have a good relationship. Still do not, in fact.”

Rini could almost feel her eyes perking up with curiosity. Anomen had never really spoken about his family, saying only that they were merchant nobility and that his father and sister resided in the government district. This was definitely news. “I’m sorry to hear that,” she said.

A bitter smile was playing around the corners of Anomen’s mouth by now, and when he spoke he seemed to do so almost as much to himself as to her. “If Lord Cor was not deep into his cups, he was demanding that I uphold the family honor...or telling me what a worthless son I had become. He was derisive of my choice to join the Order. He wanted me to take over his mercantile business...something I truly had no stomach for. I would have given much for my father to be my mentor...but, instead, I endured his abuse until I was able to squire for the Order. I fled as quickly as I was able to.”

And that’s not all, is it? Rini thought. There’s more, I’m sure of it. Poor Anomen…what must that have been like? Gorion…I never doubted that he loved me, ever. Every child deserves to have that. No wonder he’s so eager about the Order either, it’s his way of proving himself. “That’s completely horrible, Anomen!” she said, taking the priest’s hand and giving it a brief squeeze. “But you’re not worthless at all, you know. I don’t think so. And if your father can’t see that, then he’s a blind fool.”

Anomen laughed briefly, and there was a strangely earnest look in his eyes. “Ah, my lady, you always manage to lighten my spirits,” he said. “I…I suppose I am telling you this because you remind me a little of my sister, Moira. She is young and determined...I miss her.... perhaps the only thing of my family I miss.” His face turned solemn once more. “I regret abandoning her to her fate, alone with Lord Cor...but there was...little I could do. She...I am sure she...” Then he shook his head briskly. “No. Never mind. I do not wish to speak further about this, my lady Zaerini...excuse me.” He stood hastily, with a mumbled excuse about going to check on his supply of healing potions, and turned away from her, but not before she could see a suspicious shine in his eyes.

Poor Anomen…I wish there was something I could do for him. But there isn’t, at least not here and now.

Zaerini’s musings were suddenly interrupted by a wild and panicky scream inside her head. Aaaaaahhh! Get it off, get it off, get it OFF OF ME! As she looked up she was almost bowled over by a furry black comet that came hurling towards her, hissing and spitting. Softpaws’ fur was standing so much on edge that she looked twice her normal size, her eyes were glowing like green fire, and on her back…on her back was a very tiny and fluffy brown monkey, gleefully clinging to her neck with its legs as it yanked at her whiskers with tiny pink hands. Insufferable certainly seemed to be enjoying himself, even if the cat wasn’t. As her enraged familiar leapt onto her shoulder, Rini was very grateful that she was wearing a thick tunic, as Softpaws seemed to have utterly forgotten about pulling her claws in. Somehow she managed to get hold of the cat, and then pried the tiny monkey off of her. It sat fearlessly in the middle of her palm, grinning up at her.

That…that little disgusting beast! Softpaws hissed. I’ll show it I’m not a horse, give it here and I’ll swallow it whole!

I can’t let you eat Edwin’s familiar! He’d never forgive me.

What about me? That…that thing tried to ride me!

I’ll make sure he doesn’t do it again, I promise.

Hmpf. You’d better. If he comes near my back again I will eat him, familiar or not.

Suddenly there was another voice in Zaerini’s head, a cheeky, cheerful little voice. Hi, pretty cat lady! Will you rub my tummy some more?

I suppose I might…but only if you promise to never try to ride my cat again.

The little monkey pouted for a few seconds, but then it grinned again. All right. I just got bored…the boss is working too hard on that scroll of his and I wanted to have some fun. But I promise I won’t make the pretty kitty mad again. Not if you don’t want me to. It almost seemed the tiny beast was leering up at her, but surely that couldn’t be?

I think I’d better take you back to Eddie, she said as she administered the promised tummy rub. You’re his responsibility after all.

Mmmm…that feels so good! Insufferable gave her an innocent look that she didn’t trust one bit. She already had a good idea this monkey was about as innocent as its wizard was. Want me to find you some insects? Some really nice insects?

I’ll pass, thanks.

Some bananas? Spiders, maybe? There’s good eating on a spider.

No thanks.

By this time Rini had reached the corner where Edwin sat, totally immersed in the Nether Scroll, his cowl slipping forward so that his face was hidden. Now and then he muttered something to himself, and he was clearly concentrating so deeply that he was practically in a different world. “Your monkey tried to ride on the back of my cat,” she said in a mock-stern voice, causing the wizard to jump. Then she rapidly deposited the little animal in the middle of the Nether Scroll, from where it rushed up along Edwin’s arm to his shoulder and proceeded to nuzzle his ear.

“Agh!” Edwin said, jumping. “Do you have to sneak up on me like that? Suppose I had mistakenly uttered a few syllables from the Scroll and…and turned the entire ocean into blood or something? Or caused a plague of grasshoppers and door-to-door-salesmen? (I bet she would be sorry then).”

“I’m sorry, Eddie,” the half-elf laughed, unable to hold her chuckle back. Then she plopped down on the floor next to the wizard, lying on her stomach with her feet in the air, still grinning mischievously. “You sort of deserved it though, for not keeping track of your monkey. Poor Softy was beside herself.” And you look very cute when you’re flustered too.

Edwin had removed Insufferable from his shoulder and was holding the monkey in his palm, presumably telling it off through the familiar link. From the utterly unrepentant look of the monkey and Edwin’s increasingly red face, it didn’t seem as if he was having much success though. “No!” the wizard finally almost shouted. “Humans do not do that! Or that! And she does not want to ‘groom me for fleas’, even if I had any, which I don’t. (Unlike certain disgusting warrior types I pay attention to my personal hygiene).” He suddenly seemed to realize that he had spoken out loud, and his cheeks turned an even brighter red than before. “I…that is…what I meant to say was…”

“That’s all right, Eddie,” Zaerini said with an absolutely straight face. “I’ll groom you for fleas anytime you ask me to.”