Headaches 2

Disclaimer:

this story is about an elven mage, Glafir. It has everything a decent story should not have. It's dark, it has sexual hints, blunt mischaracterization, abominable deviations from the game's content etc.

I apologize to anyone who will brave it, but will feel like s/he wasted time. Unfortunately this story will last for a number of chapters, so I am considering posting it in the Serials section. The Chapter 1 is here if you tried to read the second chapter and it is incomprehensible:

http://www.gamejag.c...ewtopic&t=71913

I will be extremely grateful to anyone who will point out grammar glitches, misspellings and other writing sins

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2

An ancient wisdom teaches us that a smart-looking mephit is a mephit who learned to keep his eyes half-hidden under his leathery eyelids. The said look does not add a single clever thought to the creature’s intrinsic intelligence. While we chased Irenicus all over the dungeon my attention was divided between listening to mephits arguing who is the most powerful among them and convincing them to wait with the real-life demonstrations until such time when we meet enemies, and helping the djinni to drill out of Khalid if the life had changed a lot in the last two thousand years in Calimport. Apparently the djinni was originally from around there and now felt home-sick. Neither I, nor the nostalgic djinni learned anything about Calimport, as Khalid responded to every question with a question.

An invariable question.

“Where is Jaheira?”

If I did not attach his cloak to my robes by the means of the Ring of Protection turned by a devious spell (my own invention, of cause) into the Magic Fistula of Protection, he would have wandered away searching for Jaheira. I did not have the heart to tell him for the one hundred eighty ninth time that I preserved Jaheira’s body hoping to bury it in an appropriate Druid’s Grove. If it helped him in any way, he was welcome to sit by his dead wife's side and ask her to wake up till the end of time. Unlike Minsc, who was cut down into shreds by Irenicus’ goons, it was technically possible to resurrect Jaheira, but before Khalid’s mind slipped away he hung his head and said that she would not have wanted it and something else about druidic faith. I almost hoped it was a curse. But no, could not have been, not in Khalid’s mouth! I obeyed, as I knew that rarely a thing was in Khalid’s head, that Jaheira did not have first.

Our inopportune crew was browsing the upper floor of the compound, mephits looking longingly to their cages, when Imoen blew her horn thrice, signaling to me that Irenicus was found. Yes, mephits might be quick, but golems are sturdy and reliable. I bet they did not waste their time, chatting about which one of them is more powerful. Imoen’s chose well. Vowing to load on the potions of insight next time I would try to compete with my dear sis, I rushed towards the secret passage which led to the surface. Irenicus and Bodhi were surely to be complimented on their skill for being able to make it this far. Irenicus was a smart guy after all though not nearly equal to my blazing half-divine self or my foxy sister.

We ran into Dynaheir by the exit. The witch stood on a rotten wooden platform frivolously waving her hand in the air. I tore my gaze off her breasts, and turned my attention to what was going on. A long line of fire connected Dynaheir to a couple of hooded figures. Like beads on a string, I thought. It would have been a very pretty scene, if not for the stench and Boo’s shrilling cries.

“Shadow Thieves again?” I asked of my beloved. Maybe Immoen was right, maybe we should have taken the Guild much earlier. Their visits were annoying. Hey, there is space enough in the sewers of Athkatla for five guilds and a dozen of mad mages! Why couldn't they leave our cosy dungeon alone? Dynaheir nodded, as if agreeing to my thoughts, and shook her hand, extinguishing the scorcher. An oldy but goodie. The charred corpses fell down, unsupported by the magic energy.

“Thy passage is opened by mine arts. I would’st follow thee, milord.”

I had no time for the Old Tongue courtesies so I flashed her another kind and approving smile and continued my run. She kept alongside easily, while I was starting to pant. Maybe I should have followed her for those twenty leagues!

Shortly we emerged from the secret doors right in the middle of the market square in Athkatla, mephits, djinni and all, to the delight of the gathered crowd. If you think about it long enough, the market square does not sound like a good place for a secret door...But fortunately, the circus was in town, so I hoped we looked reasonably inconspicuous.

Imoen and Irenicus were surrounded by a number of men in bright pink, purple, golden, azure, emerald and silver cloaks. They were all shouting asking Imoen to show them more of her powerful magic. Cowled Wizards, the members of an amateur wizard society of Athkatla, were notoriously easy to impress. I doubted that their chairman could cast a fireball. But the less talent a person has in her hobby, the more enthusiasm, perseverance and pride she invests into it.

I chuckled and was about to step right in and show them the real heights of the Arcane, when Imoen told everyone to stand still.

Imoen screwed up her face and squinted, just like she did in her childhood when trying to give an impression that she is not looking at the piece of cake. She mumbled complete nonsense for a good two minutes in a row, and nothing happened. As expected. One cannot mumble nonsense and hope for something to happen. Years of studies and careful preparation...

The roaring sound deafened me, and the earth gave away under my feet. I fell to the ground, Khalid, mephits, Dynaheir and djinni collapsing on top of me, as if they had some secret agreement, and I fainted. The last thought which flashed in my mind was that I would restrict their society’s membership. From now on it has to be humans only, and no names starting with K....It will be females only. Gorgeous and tiny females only.

When I came back, Dynaheir and Khalid sat by me on the marble steps. Right in the middle of the market square rose a tall building, clearly built by a magical user, as no stone-mansion can possibly devise and erect that many useless twisted columns each of its own sort of stone, triple arched windows gilded with mithril, domes of all shapes and sizes, threatening to topple over every minute, and the gates featuring every god on Faerun. Well, I did not count exactly, but I saw Shaundakul, and if that bugger made it, the rest must have as well. The glorious face of our divine Sire was right in the middle, shiny as ever.

Dynaheir helped me and Khalid up. “Where is Jaheira?” Khalid asked. I looked at the building and sighed. So much for my plans to bury the druid in the grove. I could only hope she liked pompous gravestones.

The tall blond man greeted us by the gates with a smile: “Welcome, my friends. Lady Imoen, the Daughter of Lathander and the Vampire Queen had gifted us with the Edifice for the Magically Deviant. But it is already lovingly nicknamed by the people as the Spellfree. Pay your price and enter.”

Moved it to Serials, I see. Good choice. But you'll never escape me. Muhahahahaha...

The said look does not add a single clever thought to the creature’s intrinsic intelligence. Hence, my mind feasted on the rich foods while we chased Irenicus all over the dungeon.

Hmmm. Not quite sure what you meant here.

My attention was divided between listening to mephits arguing who is the most powerful among them and convincing them to wait with the real-life demonstrations until such time when we meet enemies, and helping djinni to drill out of Khalid if the life had changed a lot in the last two thousand years in Calimport. Neither I, nor djinni learned anything about Calimport, as Khalid responded to every question with a question.

the djinni, in both cases. Unless Glafir summoned up a bunch of them.

And why are they asking Khalid about Calimport? Aren't they underneath Athkatla?

An invariable question.

“Where is Jaheira?”

Well, can ya blame him?

If I did not attach his cloak to my robes by the means of the Ring of Protection turned by a devious spell (of my own invention of cause) into the Magic Fistula of Protection, he would have wandered away searching for Jaheira.

...my own invention, of course

If it helped him in any way, he was welcome to sitting by his dead wife’s side and asking her to wake up till the end of time.

Tense issues--might be better as "he was welcome to sit by his dead wife's side and ask her..."

Unlike Minsc, who was cut down into shreds by Irenicus’ goons, it was technically possible to resurrect Jaheira, but before Khalid’s mind slipped away he hanged his head and said that she would not have wanted it and something else about druidic faith. I almost hoped it was a curse. But no, could not have been, not in Khalid’s mouth! I obeyed, as I knew that rarely a thing was in Khalid’s head, that Jaheira did not have first.

...hung his head...

Heh! Poor Khalid...

Our inopportune crew was browsing the upper floor of the compound, mephits looking longingly to their cages, when Imoen blew her horn trice, signaling to me that Irenicus was found.

Blew her horn twice? Or thrice?

Yes, mephits might be quick, but golems are sturdy and reliable. I bet they did not waste their time, chatting about which one of them is more powerful.

Nah, they chat about degrading chores and annoying mephits.

Imoen’s chose well. Vowing to load on the potions of insight next time I would try to compete with my dear sis, I rushed towards the secret passage which led to the surface. Irenicus and Bodhi were surely to be complemented on their skill for being able to make it this far. Irenicus was a smart guy after all though not nearly equal to my blazing half-divine self or my foxy sister.

Imoen chose well.

...surely to be complimented...

Man, Glafir has a MAJOR ego!

We ran into Dynaheir by the very exit.

Don't think you need the very.

“Shadow Thieves again?” I asked of my beloved. Maybe Immoen was right, maybe we should have taken the Guild much earlier. Their visits were annoying. Hey, there is space enough in the sewers of Athkatla for five guilds and a dozen of mad mages! Why couldf not they leave our cosy dungeon alone?

Imoen
could--might sound smoother as couldn't they leave...

Yeah! That'll teach you nosy Shadow Thieves, always poking your noses where they don't belong!

I had no time for the Old Tongue courtesies so I flashed her another kind and approving smile and continued my run. She kept alongside easily, while I was starting to pant. Maybe I should have followed her for those twenty leagues!

(*starts to make a comment about "paying Dynaheir some tongue courtesies", but changes her mind*)

Shortly we emerged from the secret doors right in the middle of the market square in Athkatla, mephits, djinni and all, to the delight of the gathered crowd. If you think about it long enough, the market square does not sound like a good place for a secret door...But fortunately, the circus was in town, so I hoped we looked reasonably inconspicuously.

...so I hoped we looked reasonably inconspicuous.

Oh, yes. VERY smooth, Glafir. You could teach those Harpers a thing or two about building secret hideouts.

Imoen and Irenicus were surrounded by a number of men in bright pink, purple, golden, azure, emerald and silver cloaks. They were all shouting asking Imoen to show them more of her powerful magic. Cowled Wizards, the members of an armature wizard society of Athkatla, were notoriously easy to impress.

...of an amateur wizard society...

LOL! Don't tell me, Valygar is their leader.

One cannot mumble nonsense and hope for something to happen. Years of studies and careful preparation...

Yer just jealous...

From now on it has to be humans only, and no names starting with K....It will be females only. Gorgeous and tiny females only.

What if Glafir found a gorgeous, tiny, human female named Kandi?

When I came back, Dynaheir and Khalid sat by me on the marble steps. Right in the middle of the market square rose a tall building, clearly build by a magical user, as no stone-mansion can possibly devise and erect that many useless twisted columns each of it’s own sort of stone, triple arched windows gilded with mithril, domes of all shapes and sizes, threatening to topple over every minute, and the gates featuring every god on Faerun.

...clearly built by a magic user...

...each of its own...

What a wacky tower.

Well, I did not count exactly, but I saw Shaundakul, and if that bugger made it, the rest must have as well. The glorious face of our divine Sire was right in the middle, shiny as ever.

Shiny? Shiny and happy?

Dynaheir helped me and Khalid up. “Where is Jaheira?” Khalid asked. I looked at the building and sighed. So much for my plans to bury the druid in the grove. I could only hope she liked pompous gravestones.

Nah, that's Anomen.

The tall blond man greeted us by the gates with a smile: “Welcome, my friends. Lady Imoen, the Daughter of Lathander and the Vampire Queen had gifted us with the Edifice for the Magically Deviant. But it is already lovingly nicknamed by the people as the Spellfree. Pay your price and enter.”

Daughter of Lathander AND a Vampire Queen! Now that's an Imoen you don't see every day. Wonder what sort of price you have to pay to get into the tower.

Nice chapter. Very amusing.

Lol! So poor Jon-Jon is loose in Athkatla? Or inside Spellfree? I hope Imoen puts him in a pink cage.

Nice Khalid.

Funny

The roaring sound deafened me, and the earth gave away under my feet. I fell to the ground, Khalid, mephits, Dynaheir and djinni collapsing on top of me, as if they had some secret agreement, and I fainted. The last thought which flashed in my mind was that I would restrict their society’s membership. From now on it has to be humans only, and no names starting with K....It will be females only. Gorgeous and tiny females only.

seems likle he has a taste for halflings.

Hunter

He is inside the Spellfree captured by Imoen, Bodhi is on the loose
Thank you for reading and commenting!

The roaring sound deafened me, and the earth gave away under my feet. I fell to the ground, Khalid, mephits, Dynaheir and djinni collapsing on top of me, as if they had some secret agreement, and I fainted. The last thought which flashed in my mind was that I would restrict their society’s membership. From now on it has to be humans only, and no names starting with K....It will be females only. Gorgeous and tiny females only.

seems likle he has a taste for halflings.

Hunter

Oh, now that gives me ideas! Mazzy vs Dynaheir romance conflict! Yammmmmy!
Thank you for reading and commenting!

Moved it to Serials, I see. Good choice. But you'll never escape me. Muhahahahaha...

Well, I shall see how long the story will be, but it feels like a serial now

The said look does not add a single clever thought to the creature’s intrinsic intelligence. Hence, my mind feasted on the rich foods while we chased Irenicus all over the dungeon.

Hmmm. Not quite sure what you meant here.

Heh, being too obscure I guess. I'll cut it out.

And why are they asking Khalid about Calimport? Aren't they underneath Athkatla?

Oh, I was thinking along the lines that Djinni comes from the East, maybe from Calimshan itself (or lived theer for a time), before being captured and transfered elsewhere. However the djinni kept fond memorie of Calimport Khalid, as a native of Calimport could tell him how the things are there. LOL.

Well, can ya blame him?

Heh! Poor Khalid...

Yes, poor soul, I am guessing a cure is in order at some point.

Nah, they chat about degrading chores and annoying mephits.

Perhaps...now that gives me an idea for Nalia's keep

Man, Glafir has a MAJOR ego!

Major just barely touches the surface there

Yeah! That'll teach you nosy Shadow Thieves, always poking your noses where they don't belong!

Aye, aye...silly thieves

Oh, yes. VERY smooth, Glafir. You could teach those Harpers a thing or two about building secret hideouts.

Yep, I think Glafir would have painted the Harper's hut in something brighter than orange!

LOL! Don't tell me, Valygar is their leader.

not as bad, but almost as bad....wait and see

Yer just jealous...

Glafir: Me? Jealous of half-mage, half-theif, half-vampire? Hmmm...there are too many parts

What if Glafir found a gorgeous, tiny, human female named Kandi?

He'd change the rules once again

What a wacky tower.

yeeep...

Shiny? Shiny and happy?

yeeeeep!

Nah, that's Anomen.

Oh, no, not "this" Anomen

Daughter of Lathander AND a Vampire Queen! Now that's an Imoen you don't see every day. Wonder what sort of price you have to pay to get into the tower.

An unthinkable one!

Nice chapter. Very amusing.

Thank you! Lol, I hope the forum will settle so I can edit my post! So far has been unsucessful!