Hello Cthulhu #12

The party finishes looting the lair of the slave lords, then they go to the government district to talk to Inspecter Bragga. Bragga, according to Nalia's father, is the last honest cop in the city. The documents they recovered from the slave lords should shake many a house of noble repute.

They then spent a few hours shopping. They got some powerful weapons, and traded in some of their weapons for even more powerful weapons and armor. Jaheira admired the fit of her new Aegar's Hide armor, and Minsc liked the axe Azuredge.

Minsc: Minsc likes his new axe. Even Boo thinks this new axe will give the backhand of goodness to the pimply face of evil! Woe be on to you, Evil! Minsc will apply the pore strip of goodness to the face of evil, and yank it off!!! (squeek, eek!)

Jan: Urm, Minsc, your axe is pink.

Minsc: Yes, it is. Even Boo says it is pink. Minsc thinks the axe is pretty. It is pretty in pink.

Jan: Well, you know, the color of this axe reminds me of my dear uncle Homer Janssen. He owned the largest turnip farm in these here lands, and he kept sampling his produce. "For freshness", He would say. Of course he kept putting on the weight, until he completely out grew his own clothes. He never excersized, poor Uncle Homer, except his daily walk to the house next door where he and his friends met for their morning meal, and card game. So he finally went to his tailor. His tailor said he had nothing in stock big enough except a pink Moo-moo...

Hellocthul: What is a Moo-moo?

Jan: Its a dress for ahem...very "healthy" women, sorta like a sack with arm and head holes. Anyway, poor Uncle Homer had to wear that pink Moo-moo everyday for the rest of his life to go to his Breakfast Club.

The party then set off for the bridge district.

Aegisfield: I trust you will keep your weapons at your sides...

After finding out about the mysterious murders in the bridge district, the party soon finds itself standing before the lair of the Twisted Rune. Nalia easily disarms the trap on the door.

Hellocthul: You're getting very good at that, love.

Nalia was still getting used to being called that. Hearing that makes her heart give a little leap every time.

Nalia: Well, I know you depend on my trap disarming skills, my beloved.(blush)

Jaheira: Children, the beholder, lich, vampire, assassin, mage?

Nalia in a whisper: Is she always like that?

Hellocthul: Pretty much, she is sorta like your aunty. Just not as loud.

The party prepares to rumble, casting combat spells and protections before opening the door. The doorway reveals a polished obsidian mirror surface of a portal.

Hellocthul walks in, and the rest of the party follows. They find themselves in a small room, and a line of skull traps guarding the entrance to a larger round room.

Hellocthul: Ok, looks like the occupants left...lets see what is there under mage sight...looks like a set trap spell, with an alert screamer. Well, it looks like if you step into the other room, the trap spell will trigger, and they will all gate in using those other portal mirrors. Ok, I just had a nasty idea. People, spread out prepare for battle, and archers in the little staircase.

Hellocthul casts project image. A perfect replica of Hellocthul appears, except for an "H" marking on her forehead. Hellocthul (the real one) is instantly frozen.

Nalia: My love, is that you?

Hellocthul(image) silently points to the "H" on her forehead, and moves her lips but no sound emerges.(of course, she mimes blowing a kiss at Nalia, making her giggle, and jaheira gives her a dirty look) She then casts protection from magical energy on herself, silently mouthing the words, but the spell still casts perfectly, and walks to the skull traps blocking the doorway. They detonate, and she walks into the larger round room, unharmed. She then casts a number of skull trap spells in front of the 5 portal mirrors lining the walls of the chamber.

Jaheira: Nalia, I don't know enough about arcane magic to understand. Hellocthul said the larger chamber was trapped with an alert spell. So why did she enter the round room?

Nalia: I don't know that much about the higher magics myself, Jaheira, She is so powerful and clever and brilliant and... (Jaheira rolls her eyes) anyway, from what little I know, I think that projected images will not trigger certain types of trap spells. She is so smart!!!

Jaheira: And what about that marking on her forehead?

Nalia: Oh, the "H"??? It simply identifies a projected image.

Hellocthul(image) finishes trapping each portal mirror with a few skulls each, then rejoins the party. She goes up to a smiling Nalia, and leans over to kiss her. Of course, since this is an image, Nalia feels nothing but a slight wisp of wind. The image vanishes, the spell running out, and the real Hellocthul is able to move.

Nalia: Oh love, that was like kissing moonlight, or a breeze...

The party makes final preparations. Hellocthul, loaded with her most powerful short duration protection spells, walks in person thru the doorway.

A line of witch fires appears on the single round table in the center of the room, and a lich appears.

Shandalar: So, insignificant little fleshlings, you have entered a place filled with death and pain. Why do you disturb us? Does the burden and ennui of life displease you so much you wish to have your flesh torn asunder and your souls drained for our feeding? Answer and be doomed.

Hellocthul: Oh, I'm all scared now, save this poor maiden!!! (Jaheira snorts) We came to break your bones, rend your flesh, and spit on your graves!!! We came to stamp you into the ground!!!

Shandalar: AAAAHHHHH...Amusement today, my friends. The twisted rune has some sport!

A beholder, vampire, mage and assassin all step out of a mirror. The skull traps detonate, filling the room with their blast and shock. The twisted rune members are thrown to the floor by the force of the detonations, but rise again, hurt but not killed.

Minsc hurls Azuredge against the lich, but Shandalar had already cast protection from magic weapons on himself, and the weapon returns to Minsc's hands, unable to do any harm. Hellocthul casts her most powerful spells, but the twisted rune members came prepared for battle. They came with spell protections already cast on themselves. Obviously Shandalar's little dialog gave the other members of the rune warning and time to prepare for battle.

Shandalar casts skull traps into the little staircase where the archers were firing arrows, the blast knocks Jaheira out, and Yoshimo drops to his knees, the blast twisting his ankle. Vaxall attacks Hellocthul, with his anti magic ray. Viconia, who was ready, uses the shield of balduran to bounce his death ray back at the beholder, killing him instantly. Hellocthul's spell protections were stripped by the anti magic ray, and Shandalar's abi dahzim spell had hurt her, and most of the party badly. Time for tentacle powers!!!

Hellocthul: Chuuuuuu...


Hello Cthulhu appears, dressed in a little red and white checked gingham dress, wearing tiny black leather army boots, and a cute little red and white gingham bonnet with green pigtails peeking out from them.

Hello Cthulhu: Mr. Flibble!

A cute penguin shaped sock puppet appears in her right hand. It has a big yellow beak, black and white body, and little red colored glass buttons for eyes.

Mr. Flibble: What shall we do with nasty, stinky smeg heads? I know! I shall use my magic carpet to go to the King of the Potato People. He will know what to do with nasty stinky smeg heads! Wait, Hello Cthulhu, you say the king already knows about these stinky smeg heads? What does the king say I should do to them?

Mr. Flibble talks in this cute, squeeky high pitched voice, and his expression is most annoyed. (or as annoyed as it is possible for a hand with a sock on it to express emotions.)

Hello Cthulhu bends and quickly whispers to Mr. Flibble.

Mr. Flibble: OH NO, Hello Cthulhu, we can't do that, who will clean up the mess?

Shandalar: What madness is this? A most interesting tactic, to try to make us laugh to death. I commend your imagination, fleshlings. Your brains will be a most succulent and delectable repast indeed.

Mr. Flibble: Time for Mr. Flibble to fry these stinky, annoying smeg-heads with his hex-vision!!!
Twinkle, Twinkle, little eye,
now its time for you to die!


Mr. Flibble's eyes glow red, and a blindingly bright red beam of light comes out of Mr. Flibble's eyes. The rays hit Shandalar, and it instantly explodes into dust. More beams blast Shryessa.

Mr. Flibble: All annoying and stinky smeg-heads gone! Wait, someone is playing hide and seek! I see you!!!

One last eye-beam hits the still invisible Layene, and she falls to the floor, her staff rolling from her hand, half her body a smoking charred cinder.

As Nalia sits up after Viconia finishes casting her Heal spell, she runs over to Hello Cthulhu, picks her up, and covers her face with kisses. Hello Cthulhu and Mr. Flibble kisses Nalia back.

Mr. Flibble: What a nice girl you are!!!

After Hellocthul is back to herself, the party looks at the mess. Yoshimo is still limping where he took a skull trap blast on his right leg, Jaheira is still knocked out, but seems ok. Minsc was healed by Viconia, and Nalia is shaken but allright.

The party loots the bodies, finding an impressive sum of gold, and the Staff of the Magi, which Hellocthul gives to Nalia. They use the eye of the beholder to activate the exit portal.