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Order or Righteous Tusk, part 11


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#1 Guest_Lord E_*

Posted 09 November 2002 - 07:13 PM

- "Feel like singing. Only the songs I know not very knightish," Tazok said, as he and the children of Bhaal had walked a while.

- "I am sure Tyr won't mind. The songs of even most pious soldiers tend to get a bit rude when the soldiers in question are worn enough," Sarevok said. He was not sure that he wanted to hear the ogre singing, but he wanted to encourage him.

- "Yeah, go ahead and sing," Emilia encouraged.

- "... not so suitable for a lady..." Tazok muttered.

- "Taz. Let's just say that I have battled demons, shared a camp with a duergar berserker and waded through the moron spawning grounds otherwise known as Sword Coast. So go ahead."

Sarevok blushed at that.

- "Really, bro," Emilia sniggered. "You should not have been that stingy. I mean, the assassins would probably have been succesful unless they felt compelled to recite poetry, utter a cool catchphrase or otherwise announce themselves."

- "I am glad that they were unsuccesful, Emilia," Sarevok said, not laughing.

- "I know. Just teasing." Emilia smiled warmly at her brother.

Tazok still felt a bit insecure.

- "Go ahead, sing!" Emilia urged. Tazok cleared his throat.



Me like killing, me like gore

Me will kick inside the door

Me will rip your limbs apart

then split your ass so that you fart

Me like killing, me like gore

One kill will make me want some more

Me will flay your skin from bones

Me will delight in your moans

Kill! Gore! Wanna kill some more!

Kill Gore! Bodies cover floor!

Me...


Tazok quit abruptly.

- "Not feels... right to sing so anymore," he said. "Not understand... is just words. But I not think Tyr like that kind of thing."

- "I am sure that we can find a bit more... paladinish song for you," Emilia replied kindly. "Anomen may know one, or a bard. Or we could compose one ourselves, hmmm?"

Tazok nodded, but still looked unhappy.

- "This just... so hard! So much things me know nothing about, and an ogre... usually not very good in knighty stuff."

- "But yet you want to try," Sarevok said evenly.

- "My god called me. Was feeling empty, that all my life good for nothing. Tyr gave... important job. Just... it is so hard."

- "No-one ever said being a paladin is easy, Tazok," Sarevok replied. "I have not been called to be one, and I suspect I don't have the proper nature for such a calling. But I do know about redemption, and fighting to leave the ghosts of one's past. It is very hard, and other people are not likely to thank you, but their thanks is not why you do it. When you have a purpose, and you improve morally, it is better than anything else."

Tazok listened intently, grabbing the hilt of Justiciar with his other huge hand and the holy symbol of Tyr with another. He nodded, and understood the truth of it.

- "By Tyr me will keep trying," he said. "And find a paladinish song, for starters."

As the children of Bhaal smiled encouragingly at him, they heard a gallop of a few horses.

- "By the name of all that is holy! What is that vile thing doing with the holy symbol of the Even-Handed?"

The speaker was a knight, complete with a white horse and shining armor, followed with five other ones. Terror and outrage were competing in his voice.


Road of redemption

#2 Laufey

Posted 09 November 2002 - 07:34 PM

Awwww! It's Tazzy! :)

-> - "Yeah, go ahead and sing," Emilia encouraged.

> - "... not so suitable for a lady..." Tazok muttered.

> - "Taz. Let's just say that I have battled demons, shared a camp with

> a duergar berserker and waded through the moron spawning grounds otherwise

> known as Sword Coast. So go ahead."

LOL!

> Sarevok blushed at that.

> - "Really, bro," Emilia sniggered. "You should not have

> been that stingy. I mean, the assassins would probably have been succesful

> unless they felt compelled to recite poetry, utter a cool catchphrase or

> otherwise announce themselves."

Vadrak Dekaras: Yes, he really was scraping the bottom of the barrel, wasn't he? 'I am Death come for thee...' Please!

> Me like killing, me like gore

> Me will kick inside the door

> Me will rip your limbs apart

> then split your ass so that you fart

> Me like killing, me like gore

> One kill will make me want some more

> Me will flay your skin from bones

> Me will delight in your moans

> Kill! Gore! Wanna kill some more!

> Kill Gore! Bodies cover floor!

> Me...

What a lovely song! :) Just what I needed to perk me up.

>> - "I am sure that we can find a bit more... paladinish song for

> you," Emilia replied kindly. "Anomen may know one, or a bard. Or

> we could compose one ourselves, hmmm?"

Anomen, eh? That should prove interesting. :(

> Tazok nodded, but still looked unhappy.

> - "This just... so hard! So much things me know nothing about, and an

> ogre... usually not very good in knighty stuff."

> - "But yet you want to try," Sarevok said evenly.

> - "My god called me. Was feeling empty, that all my life good for

> nothing. Tyr gave... important job. Just... it is so hard."

Awwww....

>> - "By the name of all that is holy! What is that vile thing doing

> with the holy symbol of the Even-Handed?"

> The speaker was a knight, complete with a white horse and shining armor,

> followed with five other ones. Terror and outrage were competing in his

> voice.

Here comes the Prat Patrol...


In The Cards
Rogues do it from behind.

#3 Arcalian

Posted 09 November 2002 - 08:44 PM

> - "Feel like singing. Only the songs I know not very knightish,"

> Tazok said, as he and the children of Bhaal had walked a while.

> - "I am sure Tyr won't mind. The songs of even most pious soldiers

> tend to get a bit rude when the soldiers in question are worn

> enough," Sarevok said. He was not sure that he wanted to hear the

> ogre singing, but he wanted to encourage him.

> - "Yeah, go ahead and sing," Emilia encouraged.

> - "... not so suitable for a lady..." Tazok muttered.

> - "Taz. Let's just say that I have battled demons, shared a camp with

> a duergar berserker and waded through the moron spawning grounds otherwise

> known as Sword Coast. So go ahead."

HAHAHAHA!

Adrian: Not just the assasins were morons, either.

> - "This just... so hard! So much things me know nothing about, and an

> ogre... usually not very good in knighty stuff."

> - "But yet you want to try," Sarevok said evenly.

> - "My god called me. Was feeling empty, that all my life good for

> nothing. Tyr gave... important job. Just... it is so hard."

> - "No-one ever said being a paladin is easy, Tazok," Sarevok

> replied. "I have not been called to be one, and I suspect I don't

> have the proper nature for such a calling. But I do know about redemption,

> and fighting to leave the ghosts of one's past. It is very hard, and other

> people are not likely to thank you, but their thanks is not why you do it.

> When you have a purpose, and you improve morally, it is better than

> anything else."

Awwww.

> - "By the name of all that is holy! What is that vile thing doing

> with the holy symbol of the Even-Handed?"

> The speaker was a knight, complete with a white horse and shining armor,

> followed with five other ones. Terror and outrage were competing in his

> voice.

Now would be a good time for Tyr to speak up.


Adrian
The road to the abyss may be paved with good intentions, but it is those with bad intentions that race down that road as fast as they can.

#4 Weyoun

Posted 09 November 2002 - 09:33 PM

> - "Feel like singing. Only the songs I know not very knightish,"

> Tazok said, as he and the children of Bhaal had walked a while.

> - "I am sure Tyr won't mind. The songs of even most pious soldiers

> tend to get a bit rude when the soldiers in question are worn

> enough," Sarevok said. He was not sure that he wanted to hear the

> ogre singing, but he wanted to encourage him.

Aribeth : Tyr?! *Grrrrrr.....*

Vierna : Excuse her. She drank a whole pot of coffee just now. :(

Aribeth : I like coffee! *twitches in hyperactive fashion* But I HATE Tyr! :)

> Sarevok blushed at that.

> - "Really, bro," Emilia sniggered. "You should not have

> been that stingy. I mean, the assassins would probably have been succesful

> unless they felt compelled to recite poetry, utter a cool catchphrase or

> otherwise announce themselves."

Like poofing into the room, spreading his arms and shouting : "HAHAH! Artemis!", you mean? :)

> Me like killing, me like gore

> Me will kick inside the door

> Me will rip your limbs apart

> then split your ass so that you fart

> Me like killing, me like gore

> One kill will make me want some more

> Me will flay your skin from bones

> Me will delight in your moans

> Kill! Gore! Wanna kill some more!

> Kill Gore! Bodies cover floor!

Laska : YES! Put those words to music, brother ogre!

Vierna : I worry about you, Las.

Aribeth : MORE COFFEE! :)

> - "By the name of all that is holy! What is that vile thing doing

> with the holy symbol of the Even-Handed?"

> The speaker was a knight, complete with a white horse and shining armor,

> followed with five other ones. Terror and outrage were competing in his

> voice.

Laska : Uh-oh...

Vierna : Stupidity alert!

Aribeth : Those shiny buckets of metal are sure to jump to conclusions. Let's hope this is nipped in the bud.

Great stuff,

---Weyoun

TnT Enhanced Edition: http://www.fanfictio...rds-and-Tempers

---
Sith Warrior - Master, I can sense your anger.

Darth Baras - A blind, comotose lobotomy-patient could sense my anger!

---

"The New Age? It's just the old age stuck in a microwave oven for fifteen seconds" - James Randi

#5 Guest_Lord E_*

Posted 09 November 2002 - 11:01 PM

> Awwww! It's Tazzy! :)

The one and only!

> Vadrak Dekaras: Yes, he really was scraping the bottom of the barrel,

> wasn't he? 'I am Death come for thee...' Please!

Sarry: "*blushes* So I was only a *beginning* Evil Overlord! Give me some slack, already!"

> What a lovely song! :) Just what I needed to perk me up.

Thanks :)

> Anomen, eh? That should prove interesting. :(

Oh yes...

> Awwww....

> Here comes the Prat Patrol...

The first ogre paladin is bound to have trouble.


Road of redemption

#6 Guest_Lord E_*

Posted 09 November 2002 - 11:02 PM

> HAHAHAHA!

> Adrian: Not just the assasins were morons, either.

Peri&Emilia:"Don't we know that..."

Sarry: "Hey! I wasn't responsible of ALL of the morons!"

> Now would be a good time for Tyr to speak up.

He isn't watching all the time.


Road of redemption

#7 Guest_Lord E_*

Posted 10 November 2002 - 02:58 AM

> Aribeth : Tyr?! *Grrrrrr.....*

> Vierna : Excuse her. She drank a whole pot of coffee just now. :(

So that explains the voice acting.

> Aribeth : I like coffee! *twitches in hyperactive fashion* But I HATE Tyr!

> :)

Hey, is it Tyr's fault what happened? Hate Nasher & co instead.

> Laska : YES! Put those words to music, brother ogre!

It's the familiar army movie marching song :)

> Great stuff,

> ---Weyoun

Thank ya!


Road of redemption

#8 Guest_Ophidia_*

Posted 10 November 2002 - 09:27 AM

> - "Feel like singing. Only the songs I know not very knightish,"

> Tazok said, as he and the children of Bhaal had walked a while.

> - "I am sure Tyr won't mind. The songs of even most pious soldiers

> tend to get a bit rude when the soldiers in question are worn

> enough," Sarevok said. He was not sure that he wanted to hear the

> ogre singing, but he wanted to encourage him.

> - "Yeah, go ahead and sing," Emilia encouraged.

> - "... not so suitable for a lady..." Tazok muttered.

> - "Taz. Let's just say that I have battled demons, shared a camp with

> a duergar berserker and waded through the moron spawning grounds otherwise

> known as Sword Coast. So go ahead."

Hehe! When did she share a camp with a duergar berserker?

> Sarevok blushed at that.

> - "Really, bro," Emilia sniggered. "You should not have

> been that stingy. I mean, the assassins would probably have been succesful

> unless they felt compelled to recite poetry, utter a cool catchphrase or

> otherwise announce themselves."

> - "I am glad that they were unsuccesful, Emilia," Sarevok said,

> not laughing.

> - "I know. Just teasing." Emilia smiled warmly at her brother.

> Tazok still felt a bit insecure.

> - "Go ahead, sing!" Emilia urged. Tazok cleared his throat.

> Me like killing, me like gore

> Me will kick inside the door

> Me will rip your limbs apart

> then split your ass so that you fart

OUCH!

> Me like killing, me like gore

> One kill will make me want some more

> Me will flay your skin from bones

> Me will delight in your moans

> Kill! Gore! Wanna kill some more!

> Kill Gore! Bodies cover floor!

> Me...

> Tazok quit abruptly.

> - "Not feels... right to sing so anymore," he said. "Not

> understand... is just words. But I not think Tyr like that kind of

> thing."

Now I wonder what makes him think that?

> - "I am sure that we can find a bit more... paladinish song for

> you," Emilia replied kindly. "Anomen may know one, or a bard. Or

> we could compose one ourselves, hmmm?"

Anomen might even have written his own...horrible thought!

> Tazok nodded, but still looked unhappy.

> - "This just... so hard! So much things me know nothing about, and an

> ogre... usually not very good in knighty stuff."

Heh, he hasn't quite separated the reality of being a knight from the legend, has he?

> - "But yet you want to try," Sarevok said evenly.

> - "My god called me. Was feeling empty, that all my life good for

> nothing. Tyr gave... important job. Just... it is so hard."

> - "No-one ever said being a paladin is easy, Tazok," Sarevok

> replied. "I have not been called to be one, and I suspect I don't

> have the proper nature for such a calling.

Putting it mildly!

> But I do know about redemption,

> and fighting to leave the ghosts of one's past. It is very hard, and other

> people are not likely to thank you, but their thanks is not why you do it.

> When you have a purpose, and you improve morally, it is better than

> anything else."

> Tazok listened intently, grabbing the hilt of Justiciar with his other

> huge hand and the holy symbol of Tyr with another. He nodded, and

> understood the truth of it.

> - "By Tyr me will keep trying," he said. "And find a

> paladinish song, for starters."

There's Laufey's song about armour polish... ;)

> As the children of Bhaal smiled encouragingly at him, they heard a gallop

> of a few horses.

> - "By the name of all that is holy! What is that vile thing doing

> with the holy symbol of the Even-Handed?"

> The speaker was a knight, complete with a white horse and shining armor,

> followed with five other ones. Terror and outrage were competing in his

> voice.

Is this Anomen, or a random tin can?


Glorious Train Wrecks

#9 Guest_Lord E_*

Posted 11 November 2002 - 05:20 AM

> Hehe! When did she share a camp with a duergar berserker?

She has been traveling with Korgan :)

> Now I wonder what makes him think that?

'Tis the paladin instinct...

> Anomen might even have written his own...horrible thought!

*shudder*

> Heh, he hasn't quite separated the reality of being a knight from the

> legend, has he?

Oh no. He tries and goes the way he can think of about it.

> There's Laufey's song about armour polish... :)

It even has the same melody than the one Tazzy sung in this one!

> Is this Anomen, or a random tin can?

We will see...


Road of redemption

#10 Requiem

Posted 11 November 2002 - 08:18 AM

> - "This just... so hard! So much things me know nothing about, and an

> ogre... usually not very good in knighty stuff."

Now there's an image. A *knighty* ogre. :)

> - "But yet you want to try," Sarevok said evenly.

> - "My god called me. Was feeling empty, that all my life good for

> nothing. Tyr gave... important job. Just... it is so hard."

> - "No-one ever said being a paladin is easy, Tazok," Sarevok

> replied. "I have not been called to be one, and I suspect I don't

> have the proper nature for such a calling. But I do know about redemption,

> and fighting to leave the ghosts of one's past. It is very hard, and other

> people are not likely to thank you, but their thanks is not why you do it.

> When you have a purpose, and you improve morally, it is better than

> anything else."

> Tazok listened intently, grabbing the hilt of Justiciar with his other

> huge hand and the holy symbol of Tyr with another. He nodded, and

> understood the truth of it.

> - "By Tyr me will keep trying," he said. "And find a

> paladinish song, for starters."

This really cracks me up when I think about it. An orge as a paladin. *grins*

> As the children of Bhaal smiled encouragingly at him, they heard a gallop

> of a few horses.

> - "By the name of all that is holy! What is that vile thing doing

> with the holy symbol of the Even-Handed?"

> The speaker was a knight, complete with a white horse and shining armor,

> followed with five other ones. Terror and outrage were competing in his

> voice.

Of course. Another tin-plated, loud-mouthed, prejudiced hothead. Time for heads to roll. Golf anyone?

j.



#11 Guest_Lord E_*

Posted 11 November 2002 - 08:29 AM

> Now there's an image. A *knighty* ogre. :)

*grin* I don't remember how I came up with the idea for this story, but the thing that triggered it was the image of ogres, orcs and other 'evil race people' as knights.

> This really cracks me up when I think about it. An orge as a paladin.

> *grins*

I recall that in 2nd edition only humans could be paladins (except DM-allowed exceptions with a suitable background story). The reasoning was that given their short lifespan compared to the other races only humans are likely to muster enough passion, drive, and hands-on attitude to be one. Well, the beast-races are even more short-lived than humans...

on the other hand, the ogre culture is certainly very different from knight one :) All of which I think is a nice ingredients for a story.

> Of course. Another tin-plated, loud-mouthed, prejudiced hothead. Time for

> heads to roll. Golf anyone?

Bound to happen sooner to later. Let's see how Tazok will fare.

> j.


Road of redemption

#12 Guest_Silver_*

Posted 11 November 2002 - 09:47 PM

> - "Yeah, go ahead and sing," Emilia encouraged.

Yeah go on! Sing!

> Me like killing, me like gore

> Me will kick inside the door

> Me will rip your limbs apart

> then split your ass so that you fart

> Me like killing, me like gore

> One kill will make me want some more

> Me will flay your skin from bones

> Me will delight in your moans

> Kill! Gore! Wanna kill some more!

> Kill Gore! Bodies cover floor!

Brilliant song! I liked it! :-)

> Tazok nodded, but still looked unhappy.

Poor Tazok...

> - "By the name of all that is holy! What is that vile thing doing

> with the holy symbol of the Even-Handed?"

> The speaker was a knight, complete with a white horse and shining armor,

> followed with five other ones. Terror and outrage were competing in his

> voice.

Nice chapter. :-D

Silver



#13 Guest_Lord E_*

Posted 12 November 2002 - 07:54 PM

> Yeah go on! Sing!

> Brilliant song! I liked it! ;)

And the tune is the familiar army marching song :)

> Poor Tazok...

Isn't easy to be the first ogre paladin.

> Nice chapter. :D

> Silver

Thank you!


Road of redemption




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