Her Eyes Were Green

A dream, and what came after....

She knew she was dreaming, but she did not care. She was in his arms again, leaning into his chest as his arms pulled her closer, until she could feel the gentle breeze of his breath on her ear. She smiled faintly and closed her eyes, letting her head fall back until it lay on his shoulder, and she could feel the gentle pressure of his lips on her skin, the familiar tingling in her stomach as his smooth voice purred in her ear. "What are you thinking?"

"Nothing, really…." She sighed softly, raising a slender hand to curl her fingers over the smooth muscles of his forearm. She stroked the coarse hair gently as she opened her eyes and glanced up toward his face, seeing nothing beyond the line of his chin. It was strong, and as smooth as a child’s, though she thought she could faintly see the first dark shadows of growth along the edge. She tilted her head for a moment, considering.

"Have you ever thought of growing a beard?"

He chuckled softly, glancing down just enough so that she could see the tip of his nose beyond his chin, could see the full shape of his lips as they curled into a familiar smile. How she wished she could see his face! She had tried before. And she had seen it, she knew that she had, but it had faded from before her eyes into the unwelcome light of wakefulness, lost and forgotten.

She could remember the eyes, though. Blue. As blue as the most perfect sapphires, strong and clear. Uncertain, almost shy… but with a fire that spoke of mischief. And passion….

"I had considered it, once." He shifted slightly in his seat, closing his arms gently over her shoulders and pulling her again into his chest with a contented sigh. "I fear that my efforts were actually rather… pathetic."

He laughed again, and she could almost feel it in his chest, rumbling softly. She smiled, but said nothing, waiting for him to continue as what little of his face she could see again disappeared behind the line of his jaw. "I was told by one of the others that it looked rather like someone had taken the sheddings from a mangy hound and had… glued them to my face. And not very artistically, at that…."

She laughed softly, raising a finger and stroking it lightly along the length of his jawline. "Oh, I don’t know. I imagine you would look rather like the romantic hero. Dashing, brilliantly arrogant, with a smile that could…."

His laughter interrupted her. "Now you begin to sound like her." He thought for a moment, then shook his head. "She had told me that once." He leaned a little further back against… whatever it was that he was sitting against. She let her finger fall with a grin, waiting for him to go on.

"She reads those novels, you know. Princes and damsels and knights in armor…." He laughed again, a little embarrassed this time. "In fact, she talked me into reading one, once. It was…. Interesting." He chuckled at the last word.

"But I rather liked it. I don’t know, it was just… painfully romantic." He sighed softly, thoughtfully. "Perhaps that why I became…." His voice trailed off as he struggled to remember any details about his own life. "I don’t know. But something…."

"What is her name?"

He glanced down. "Hmm?"

"This woman’s name…." She laughed playfully, almost wickedly, and threatened to pull herself from his arms. "This other woman… The one that makes you read impossibly silly romantic novels…. Should I be worried?"

He laughed and pulled her back to him, resting his chin on the top of her head. "Oh, I don’t know. She’s familiar enough. A cousin, maybe, or a sister…. It’s so hard to think here. And her name?" He shook his head after a long moment, smiling.

She laughed softly again, moving her head under his chin until she could almost see up into his face. "Then I guess I won’t worry too much, if you can’t remember her name…."

Her words trailed into silence as he took her hand and raised it to his lips softly, then curled his own fingers over it and held it to his heart, saying nothing more. Nothing needed to be said. She let her eyes drop slightly, almost bashfully, curling the tips of her fingers over his, and they sat in this way for some time. It was a comfortable silence, and she was actually a little startled when his voice finally broke it again, hesitantly.

"What… what is your name?"

His question completely took her by surprise. She glanced up toward his face, seeing in the shadows a pair of brilliant blue eyes that searched hers almost desperately, pleading for an answer that should have been so easy to give. But when she opened her mouth to reply, she suddenly found herself unable to remember, and her words came instead as a disappointed sigh, breathless and empty.

"I..I don’t know." She shook her head, her eyes fading into thoughtfulness as she struggled to remember. "I… know when I’m awake, but now… here…. I can’t tell you….."

His eyes faltered, dropping from hers as he nodded hesitantly, waiting for a long moment before speaking again. When he did, it was accompanied by a low chuckle, carrying a hint of frustration. "It… seems so unfair, doesn’t it? I mean…. Here we are. As… we should be. You are in my arms, and…."

She lowered her eyes, as well, and in a moment, she felt the pressure of his forehead on her hair, his breath on her cheek as he spoke. "I… I can’t believe that you are just a dream. You are so… real, so… alive. When I am here, when… we are here, I feel…."

Her voice barely rose above a whisper. "I know." She smiled softly and closed her eyes, savoring the feeling of his lips against her cheek. They moved slowly along her skin, to her jaw, and then disappeared into her hair, searching. She sighed contentedly, letting her head fall slightly to the side, and he thanked her by pulling her closer, murmuring burning words against her neck.

"Who are you, my love? Where are you?" He pleaded against her skin. "Tell me, and I will ride to you as on a whirlwind. Only tell me, and I will leave whatever life it is that I lead My home, my family…. Just let me be with you…."

"I…."

"Please, my love. I… I know that you can promise me nothing, but… I feel… I know that someday I will see your face in…. some darkened room, and know that…." He shook his head softly. "Know you…. I… cannot say when, or even where, for I do not know even where I am at this moment…."

His voice trailed off again into bittersweet laughter, and he shook his head again. "Forgive me, my darling. My head spins as I… try to remember. And I see only shadows of what I know must come…. But your eyes. Your beautiful eyes are there, meeting mine as if for the first time, and I know…."

"Close your eyes….."

"What?" His voice held a note of confusion, but also a faint smile, and she took a deep breath, repeating her odd request.

"Close your eyes. Please…."

He paused for a moment, then she felt him nod slowly. "All right, my love… They are closed, but…."

She turned suddenly in his arms, closing her eyes tightly as her lips searched for his, fumbling against his skin until he pulled her closer, pressing his surprised lips against hers with a desperate hunger. She whimpered slightly under their touch, feeling the fire spread through her body, into her fingertips and toes and swelling in her stomach until she gasped for breath against his mouth, slipping her arms around his shoulders.

He responded by tightening his arms around her, crushing his lips against hers again with a hoarse sigh that spoke more of his desire than words ever could. His heart beat against hers, and his hands roamed over her back into her hair, searching….

She trembled in his arms, feeling the first pull of wakefulness as it wrapped around her mind, and she fought it with a fierce desperation, pushing the invasive light away. "No…."

From the tremor in his voice, she knew that he felt it, too, and she felt the burning sting of tears in her eyes as he whispered, "No, my love… If we are to wake, do not fight it. There will be another time. Promise me…."

"No…." She pleaded with him, the dream, anyone that was listening, but she felt him slipping away, and a shuddering breath broke from her chest. "Please…."

"I will find you…." He paused, and she felt him take a sharp breath. "My love, you… you are so beautiful…."

The surprise of what he said opened her eyes, and she saw his face. His face. Though she knew that she would remember nothing of it when she woke, her eyes roamed hungrily over the tanned features, the soft brown hair, the brilliant blue eyes, the smooth, strong chin…. She smiled through her bittersweet tears and ran her finger again along his jawline. "You…" She tried to laugh, but could only whisper. "You should definitely grow a beard…."

He laughed as tears shone in his own eyes and he kissed her again, tasting the salt on her skin as he murmured against her lips. "I love you…. And I will find you. I promise…."

***

"I love you…." Her voice sounded as though it were miles away, drifting lazily on the air. Already the memory of his face was beginning to fade, no matter how desperately she clung to his disappearing arms, and she whispered again, feeling the tears slip down her skin and into the thin pillow under head.

"I love you…."

"I love you, too, but will you get up already?" The voice was not his, but a light musical tone that was all too familiar, and Kaelis sighed without opening her eyes.

"Imoen, go away…."

She was answered by a brisk shake of her shoulder and an impatient groan. "Oh, come on, Kael…."

Kaelis opened one emerald eye to look up at the little thief who knelt over her, looking down at her with somewhat of a desperate expression. "Minsc is ready to chew up the saddle leather, Kivan’s gone to go find more firewood for tonight, it’s too far back to the inn, and Jaheira is threatening to make breakfast herself… Jaheira, Kael… She’s going to cook…. You’ve just got to get up…."

Kaelis closed her eyes again with a tired chuckle, pulling up the woolen cloak that served as both bed and blanket. "Oh, the last time wasn’t so bad…."

Imoen sat back with an expression of utter disbelief. "Not so… Do you remember the last time Jaheira… It was a… It was…." Imoen sighed again and resumed shaking the fighter, more urgently this time. "I don’t know what it was, but please please please get up! She’s already going through the saddle bags, and Khalid is trying really really hard to distract her. You know, husband-type stuff, but even that’s not working, and…."

Kaelis groaned. "All right already, will you stop?" She passed a hand tiredly over her face and yawned, opening her eyes. "I’m up!"

Imoen smiled gratefully, then tilted her head. "You were dreaming about him again, weren’t you?"

Kaelis paused, then nodded faintly without a word.

"Did you see his face this time?"

Kaelis felt a smile tugging at the corner of her lips, and she thought for a moment. "Yeah… Yeah, I think I did…."

Imoen grinned expectantly. "Well?"
"Well, what?"

"What does he look like?

Kaelis opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again, drawing her brows together with a slow smile. She remembered his lips on hers, remembered the feeling of his arms around her, his hands in her hair, his whispers on her skin, but….

"I don’t know. I can’t… remember…."

Imoen groaned and rolled her eyes, grabbing a nearby pillow and throwing it at Kaelis’ face. "Yeah, okay, whatever. If you don’t want to tell me, fine… But…."

At that moment, there was a crash from somewhere behind Imoen, and a heavily accented shout in a low female voice. "Damn it all to… Khalid, come back with that…! That’s the only pan I could find! No, I… Minsc, what in the name of Silvanus are you doing???"
Imoen jumped up with a little scream and dashed off toward the commotion, and Kaelis laughed softly, closing her eyes again.

It was going to be a long day.

***

Anomen walked into the training room, whistling lightly as he scratched the faint shadow that lined his chin. Helm’s Beard, it itched like… well, a beard. He chuckled softly and shook his head as he pulled off his cotton tunic and threw it into a remarkably dustless corner, then rolled his shoulders and stretched his muscular arms as a familiar figure made his way across the floor.

"Well, Delryn, I’d say it was just about time." The older knight thrust the thicker fabric of a training tunic roughly against the young squire’s chest. "I was beginning to wonder if you had lost your nerve after all, and…."

Anomen laughed a little too loudly as he took the proffered tunic, slipping his arms into the sleeves. He looked down at the thick wool, then back up at the knight, arching a dark eyebrow. "This tunic feels a little small, Sir Duncan." Anomen made a show of struggling into the garment, sighing noisily as he pulled it over his head and smoothed it over his broad chest. "Are you sure that this is one of my own? I…."

Duncan rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Forgive me, Delryn. I had not taken into account your… perfected physique, your godlike form, your…." His voice trailed off, and he leaned closer to Anomen’s face, raising an eyebrow at what he saw there. "Well, I’ll be…" He looked up into Anomen’s laughing eyes, letting a smile pull at the corner of his mouth. "Is that a… beard?"

Anomen grimaced and scratched the dark shadow once more, sighing as he gained a little relief from the incessant tickling. "It is, Sir Duncan, and if you say a single word about it, I’ll…."

Duncan laughed and shook his head, running a hand through his own jet-black beard. "No, no… It looks very…." He paused, searching for the word.

Anomen groaned. "If you compare it to dog sheddings, like you did last time…."

Duncan laughed. "Helm’s Beard, Anomen, you were seventeen! It did look like a mongrel had rolled over your face…." The knight took Anomen’s chin in his hand and turned it this way and that, inspecting it carefully.

"This actually looks rather promising, if truth be told…." He released Anomen’s chin and folded his arms over his chest, raising his eyebrow again. "But I thought you swore that you would never attempt a beard again…." He laughed and shook his head. "What changed your mind?"

Anomen smiled lightly and shrugged his broad shoulders. "She asked me…."

Duncan widened his eyes curiously. "Oh, and who was that, exactly?"

Anomen flinched, suddenly realizing how ridiculous he was about to sound. "I… can’t tell you, actually. Because I… don’t know who she was."

"Mm-hmmm…." Duncan’s look clearly indicated his disbelief, and Anomen frowned, throwing his companion a more serious look. "Well, what did she look like, and we’ll see if we can’t track her down…."

"I don’t… I can’t remember… I know she was beautiful…" He smiled slightly at the remembrance of how she felt in his arms. The scent of jasmine in her hair…. The warmth began to spread through his stomach, and he cleared his throat, looking back at Duncan, who watched him with a rather sarcastic gaze.

"Of course she was."

Anomen frowned and pushed past the knight, who laughed as he turned to follow the squire toward the weapons rack, where Anomen was spending a rather long time looking over the maces. "Well, at least tell me what color her eyes were…. You do know that, don’t you?"

At that, Anomen stopped for a moment, then turned with a hint of smile that could almost be called shy.

"Green." His answer was almost a sigh.

"Her eyes were green."