Memories
Slowly, she crept though the halls of the Duchal Palace, Viconia DeVir, Outcast of the Drow, Cleric of Shar, one of the Slayer of Sarevok and the Heroes of Baldur's Gate. It was the dead of night, and most of her companions had already retired to their guestrooms. After two weeks of rest, Viconia had decided it was time to go...
"Art thou leaving?" A sleepy voice asked her from behind. Viconia recognized the voice and replied, yet not turning around.
"How long have you been standing there, abbil?" Viconia sighed and asked her friend.
"Apparently, long enough." The dark mage known as Dynaheir replied. "Why art thou sneaking from the palace like a common thief?"
"What does it matter to you?" Viconia retorted, a bit too harshly she thought.
"Thou art our friend, dark one. We all care about thee... And we have shared too much together to simply throw away." Dynaheir replied.
Viconia snorted. "The adventure is over! I am no longer needed. You would not miss me..."
"Nonsense..." Dynaheir replied, a bit angrily, "thou shalt certainly be missed... by all of us." Dynaheir stepped a little closer to the Drow in front of her to look her in the eyes.
"And I must say thou shalt especially be missed by one person in particular..."
***
I stumble as I run through the woods, desperately trying to escape my pursuers. As I scramble to my feet, and continue to run down the hill, I suddenly come eye to eye with a small group of adventurers. This is it! I will not run anymore! I will stand and fight back or die here! Unfortunately, my mind is more willing than my body at this time and I collapse in front of the four adventurers. My mace flies from my hands, making it next to impossible for me to defend myself. Slowly, I glance towards the four adventurers as I prepare my few spells...
Three humans and a Tu'rilthiir, a half-bred mongrel. They quickly walk up to me, looking upon me with... concern? I sink to my knees in a combination of exhaustion and relief. Though my previous experiences had soured my opinion of the surface-dwellers, I know I have nothing to lose by asking them for help.
"Help me!" I plead, "If you don't help me... They'll kill me!" I pant as I am helped to my feet by the four strangers.
"Who wishes to bring harm to thee?" A brown-skinned woman asks me with a gentle tone. Upon a first glance, I sense she has an air of quiet wisdom and resolution. I immediately assume her to be the leader of this group.
"Worry not, pretty elf! Minsc and Boo stand ready to protect!" A stupendously large human suddenly speaks up. For a moment, I think the hulking human is a small orge, though I see both kindness and feralness in his eyes... And did I hear a squeek coming from one of his pockets?
Then the half-bred male smiles friendly at me and extended his hand in a gesture of friendship. "Calm down. We will help you." He tells me with gentleness in his voice. "Tell us who you are."
Intense relief soars through me as I realize these people just might actually save me from an undeserved fate. "Thank you! Thank you so much for willing to help me" I pant, still exhausted from my flight from the Flaming Fist. "My name is Viconia. I... I am not from around here." Truer words have never been spoken...
"Jumpin' Jeepers!" A young teenage girl suddenly spoke up. "You're a Drow aren't you? I've read about your people. You must be a long way from home." Her statement is painfully obvious and I supress a snort.
Home... That word makes my emotions swirl within me. Darkness, loss, pain, my brother... "Home..." I reply, not being able to keep the sadness from creeping in my voice. "I no longer have a home. Yes, I am Drow, but I am an outcast..."
The clanking of armor interrupts my words as a burly fighter enters the grove and storms towards me. I am slightly impressed when the group of adventurers act as one and form a protective circle aroudn me.
"Ho, travellers!" He states in an all-business tone of voice. "Step aside. The creature you are harboring is wanted for murder most foul."
"He lies!" I shout my indignation from behind my protectors with an unwanted touch of desperation. "I have done nothing wrong!"
"What has this Drow been charged with, good sir?" The brown-skinned woman asks, obviously suspiscious of the soldier's motives.
The guardsman gives her an odd look, as if her question is nonsensical. "She is Drow, milady!" He chuckles, sending shivers down my spine. "Surely it is obvious that she is evil."
"Eh, Boo is confused." The large human tells the soldier pensively. "How come she is hunted down, when no crime has been committed?"
"Don't you see, Minsc!" The teenage girl shouts. "He only wants to kill her because she is Drow!" Once again, this annoying girl is making painfully obvious statements.
"Of course I do!" The soldier plainly states... Is this surface justice?
"What do you intend to do with her, when you have her?" The half-elf asks him, while glaring at him threateningly. I must admit to being very surprised. 'Could this boy actually be their leader?' I thought as I took another good look at the half-elf.
"Kill her, naturally!" He chuckles again, showing off his digustingly brown and rotting teeth. "I'll just slash her head off and leave her body to rot. The Flaming Fist believes in swift justice." I close my eyes, as it dawns to me, there is a good possibility my life will soon end.
"Justice?!" The brown-skinned woman snaps suddenly. "Thou dost not know the meaning of that word!"
"Minsc and Boo will not allow this murder! Boo is outraged and so is Minsc!" The huge human shouts with a surprisingly loud bellow.
I sigh heavily, and almost laugh. It seems my fate was to be decided not only by a male, but a lowly half-bred mongrel as well. The irony! The half-breed takes a step forward. "If you want to kill her, you can have her..." My heart sinks. Another betrayal! I should have known. And this time I would pay the price with my life.
"...But you'll have to get through us first." The half-breed snarls. My hope is instantly restored and I bent over to pick up my mace, as my protectors draw their own weapons as well.
"Fools!" The guardsman yells as he engages the adventurers, but for all his boasting, he is no match for all five of us. As the soldier lays dead, a mask of disbelief on his face, I sigh in intense relief and decide to show my gratitude to my new-found allies.
"I thank you for risking yourself on my behalf." I tell them with sincerety. I take another good look at this rag-tag group of adventurers. Perhaps I would even be able to find the protection and companionship I crave within this very group, and some of these fools could certainly use a bit of my discipline. There was a good chance these people would actually treat me with respect and would give me my measure! Half expecting rejection, before even asking for sanctuary, I walk towards the half-breed leader. "To show my gratitude, I offer you my services as a Cleric. The Goddess Shar grants me wisdom and I would be happy to accompany you for a while." I made the offer, truly hoping they would accept me in their mids.
"Truly, thee worships Shar, not Lolth?" The brown-skinned woman asks, but I notice she is not as surprised as she pretends to be. This rivvil is a crafty one.
"No... Lolth has cast me out. I have lost everything and encountered nothing but intolerance in these acursed surface-lands." I snarl, but catch myself. I would not want to drive my new companions away. "From anyone but you... I need friends... Now more then ever." I add quickly. 'I will NOT beg.' I think to myself, but deep in my heart, I know I probably would...
The half-breed gives me a reassuring smile. "Do not worry. As you have seen, we do not judge someone by their race alone. We will take you in." Years of experience tells me that the half-bred boy is attracted to me. I smile inwardly and make a mental note to possibly exploit this in the future.
"This here is my sister Imoen," He says as he introduces me to my new party-members. "The mage over here is Dynaheir of Rashamen and this is her protector Minsc..." He says as he points to the mountain of a man. "And Boo..." He adds quickly, as Man-mountain glowers at him. Yet I do not see this 'Boo'. Then... A Hamster?! I wonder briefly if the only ones that would give me quarter were the insane or the addled.
"And my name is Karis." I give all of them a curt nod and walk alongside the half-elf. "Better take this." The half-elf speaks and hands me a shield... I can feel the magic radiating from it. This partnership already seems to be paying off.
"I thank you." I reply. "Might I ask the object of our quest..."
***
"Perhaps, but it is not to be." Viconia said with a hint of sadness in her voice.
"So thou art simply leaving? After all we have been through together?" Dynaheir asked, almost an accusation...
"I stayed around for the victory celebrations, haven't I?" Viconia chuckled, "I must admit it was a unique experience to be cheered at by the rivvin for a change. Besides, I wasn't the first to leave."
"Yeslick is still in the city, setting up his new smithy. He has been given the Iron Throne building..."
"We all have been given the Iron throne building, but the rest of us simply didn't want it..." Viconia interrupted. Yeslick had always treated her well, better than she had expected from a dwarf. And she had been curteous to him in return.
"That is beside the point, Viconia."
***
I sit back against the trunk of a chopped-down tree, gazing upon the sky. It is morning, yet a bright day... I see the clouds drifting over me. Such marvels they are. Always different, never the same. Constantly changing, growing, drifting... Always beautiful... A truly wonderous spectacle in these artless surface-lands.
"I used to look at the clouds for hours when I was back at candlekeep," Karis tells me as he enters the grove. Of course I had heard him coming long before, but I allow him to approach me. I have gotten to know him a little better. He fights like a man and not a boy, and he is rather handsome, I think. We have traveled together for a month now and he and his friends... our friends have always treated me surprisingly well. Could this mean the end of the constant betrayals, I wonder? But I dare not hope...
"May I ask you a question, Karis?" I decide to test his mettle, and his resolve. He smiles and nods at me in a friendly fashion. "Do you think of Gorion often?"
My question seems to have surprised him. "Sometimes..." He answers with silence, quite ambigeously...
"Do you seek to avenge his death?" I ask, continuing the game.
He stares in front of him, eyes locked on infinity as he answers. "No... No. He would not have wanted me to avenge his death. Mosty, I just want to know... 'Why?'"
"Truly...?" I wonder and decide to take the game one step further yet.
"And if one of our companions were to fall by an enemy's blade? Would you avenge him or her then?" I grin at him.
"Perhaps..." He replies, but I see the hesitation in his eyes.
"And what if I were to die?" The last piece has been set on table and I am ready to take his King. "Would you avenge my death?" He does not answer, but instead looks upon me intently. I can see the answer in his eyes...
"Forget I asked anything." I reply and forfeit the match. "Let us just sit here and watch the clouds before we are moving on again."
***
"Where willt thou go?" Dynaheir asked, while holding the Drow by the fore-arm.
"I don't know." She replied. "Anywhere but here..."
"The people here are grateful for our deeds..." Dynaheir said with resolution
"They will forget..."
***
'Valas!... My brother!' I shout with joy at the large drider in front of me. Perhaps this time he will respond to me. Perhaps this time, he will... forgive me. I can only hope. Again, my brother says nothing. He simply stares at me as I gaze upon his bloated form. It fills me with such sadness again to see what the acursed Spider Queen has done to my poor brother...
'I'm... I'm so sorry, Valas!' I whisper as I feel the tears stream over my cheeks. I approach him, to lay my hands in his... Perhaps this time things will go diferently. But I hope that everytime I have this dream... And everytime my hopes are shattered.
He hisses at he and knocks me aside with his legs. As I lay of the floor, half-dazed, I sense his approach. Yet as he prepares to strike, the scene changes... Valas is gone, as is the anxiety I felt. I feel calm and peaceful, there is only a restful shade of gray mist surrounding me, protecting me. Something has changed in the waking world, I sense and I will myself awake...
As I awaken, I find myself staring into the eyes of Karis... He had held me while I slept... He has DARED to TOUCH me!
ME!
I push him away with as much force as I can. I grab the mace from my side and jam the hilt against his throat. "If you ever... EVER touch me like that again!" I threaten. "I will tear the beating heart from your chest and feed it to the wolves!" That said, I strolled over to the other side of camp, away from the half-elf. As I gaze at the dying embers of last night's campfire, I realize part of me is glad that he cared...
***
"Maybe Beregost holds quarter for me," Viconia said. "A lot of empty space there, plenty of room. Perhaps I can find a place of my own there."
"Is that not what we all seek?" Dynaheir muses, understanding Viconia's decision.
"I have taken my fair share of the riches we have acquired," Viconia began, "and I will leave the magical items you have given to me."
"Keep them," Dynaheir said. "He would want thee to have them. May they keep thee safe..."
Viconia simply nodded and made her way to the door. Just before leaving she turned around to face the mage once more. "Tell Karis... I am sorry. That there is nothing that could have been. And promise to me that you will not tell him where I have gone."
"I promise. I hope thou findest what thee seeks." Dynaheir told her friend sincerely.
Viconia smiled sadly at her friend once more and then strolled out of the door, intending to close this chapter of her life.
---
"She's GONE?!" Karis shouted at Dynaheir. For a moment he saw Minsc looking upon him warily, afraid that Karis might attack his charge. He nodded at Minsc once after apologizing to Dynaheir for his outburst. "Why did she leave?" He asked. Karis had lost every bit of appetite he had, sitting at the break-fast table as he was.
"I have promised not to tell thee. She only wanted me to give thee these last words..." Dynaheir told him solemnly.
"What's going on?" Imoen asked groggily as she entered the room.
"Darker elf has disappeared!" Minsc answered.
***
Nau... Ussta Dalninuk... I hear her whisper as I wake up in my bedroll. A glance over to her. It was Viconia's turn for guard-duty last night, and I see her sitting with her back against a tree. Yet, her eyes are closed... She must have fallen asleep, I realize. As I take a closer look I notice tears streaming down her cheeks! I get up from my bedroll and slowly walk towards her. As I kneel beside her I hear her speak her home tongue again.
Nau... Valas... Dalninuk... I am unfamiliar with her alien tongue, but something tells me this word Valas she keeps repeating is a name. Who is he? A friend? Family? A lover? I feel an irrational sting of pain in my heart as I consider that last option. Without hesitation I pull her to me and embrace her. Almost instantly, her weeping stops and she seems to relax in my arms as she leans her head against my chest. I feel more than a little elated having her so near me. I can feel her soft skin on mine, and the sweet scent of her hair tickles my nostrils. It hits how beautiful she truly is... It is almost overwhelming...
Then, without warning, her eyes snap open. I notice she is sleepy at first, but as soon as she realizes where she is and who is holding her, she pushed me away and snarls in anger.
"If you ever... EVER touch me like that again!" She whispers to me harshly, fury evident in her beautiful dark eyes, "I will tear the beating heart from your chest and feed it to the wolves!"
That said, she strolls away from me and sits down at the fire-pit. I sigh in sadness as I realize I have certainly ruined every chance I had with her now.
***
"Vic's gone?!" Imoen asked surprised. "Where to?"
"Dynaheir won't tell me!" Karis replied frustrated.
"I have made a promise..." She simply stated.
***
The battle rages as the Greater Nebassu Aec'Letec bears down on use. With a swipe of his claw he slams Minsc in a wall. The Tanar'ri concentrate his efforts on the spellcasters now. This monster... truly hideous. I think the artists who rendered the drawing in the books about the creatures of the lower planes back in Candlekeep were not very accurate in capturing their likeness. The smell of the beast is even more pervasive, than its looks. Hot sulfur and brimstone, truly fitting for a beast spawned in the Nine Hells!
I run to Minsc to help him to his feet and together we charge the demon again. With a single swipe of its claws we both are tossed about the underground chamber again...
As I get to my feet again, notice the beast bearing down on Viconia! She swings her flail bravely, like a true warrior. But the Nebassua knows she is no match for it... And then I notice the creature casting a spell. It is the death gaze, I realize to my horror. I think back to Gael, back in the depths of Durlag's tower... No... Not her! I think to myself as I run towards her and push her away from the beast's grasp. As soon as Viconia is out of harm's way, however, the Death Gaze befalls me.
I find myself unable to move as an agonizing pain moves through my entire body. Through the pain-induced haze I can see Minsc, shouting a battlecry and severing the beast's head with a mighty blow from his sword, sending the vile creature back to the Abyss to languish there for at least a hundred years. The pain becomes unbearable now, and I feel myself dying on the inside. Then, suddenly, the pain is gone leaving me to sink to the floor in intense relief. As I look up I notice Viconia finishing off her spell of healing on me.
'You fool,' She whispers, yet I do not notice a mocking tone in her voice.
'You sweet fool,' She tells me as she rests her hand under my arm and helps me to my feet.
***
"I simply cannot tell thee..." Dynaheir states again.
"But... I never got the chance... to tell her... How I feel about her..." Karis stammered in reply.
"She think she knows, Karis." Imoen told the person who was like a brother to her. "That's why she left, didn't she." She directed to Dynaheir.
***
"Heya!" Imoen tells me as she enters my room at the Feldepost's Inn. "Wanna see this cool new spell Dynaheir taught me?" She continues. Ever since Dynaheir agreed to take her as an apprentice, she had be even more cheerful than she usually was. Imoen always had a quick mind, but was never been given the opportunity to study magic back in Candlekeep due to her impatience. Dynaheir, however, understood this perfectly. She had been an apprentice until fairly recently and was eager to show Imoen the tricks of the magical trade. I tell her I would be glad to see her new trick.
Without hesitation Imoen lets a couple of colored balls shoot from her hands and punch into a vase at the back end of the room, shattering it into a thousand pieces. She giggles in delight, as if it is the most wonderful thing in the world.
"So you killed a bad vase?" I tell her gruffly. "Big deal."
Imoen pouts and scrutinizes me for a moment, then she grins from ear to ear. "Hey, I know that look..." Oh, gods, she knows... "You're in love!" She giggles again and sits in the chair opposite to mine, peering into my eyes. "Come on! Who is it? Dish!" She demands. But before I can say anything...
"It's someone from our party, isn't it?" She muses. "Dynaheir?" She giggles. As I shake my head, she suddenly gasps and puts her hand in front of her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. "NO! Not..."
"Yes... Her." I reply
"Not a chance, bro... Way out of your league, big fellah..." She prattles cheerfully, making me wish I had locked the door. She must have noticed my frustration by now, as she seems to have stopped laughing. "This... this is for real?" She stammers. "This isn't like Marina, is it?"
Marina, my first love... We met in Candlekeep for a summer and we both fell in love with each other for a brief time. "No," I say. "Marina was just a girl... What I feel for Viconia goes much deeper than anything I have ever felt before." I get up from my chair and pace around the room.
"She's so... so mature, so strong, so wise..." I say. "But also so distant, lonely and unhappy..."
"She's a Drow, Karis." Imoen says, trying to be gentle. "She thinks men are nothing! How much chance do you think you've got?"
"I don't know..." I stammer and let myself fall back into my chair. "I only know everything feels right when I'm near her."
***
"Please, Dynaheir... I have to know!" Karis tried.
Dynaheir sighed. "Thou dost realize that if I break my promise, I can never again be trusted when I give my word?"
"Then..." Karis tried, "Give me a clue. Let me figure it out for myself."
Dynaheir mulled this over for a bit, but still didn't seem very convinced.
"Please..." Karis asked her desperately.
***
"Hello, Karis." I hear Viconia purr as she walks past my room at the Three Kegs Inn. I look upon her to greet her in return and I notice she is dressed in a bathrobe.
"Viconia..." I smile at her, but I also feel quite uneasy when the fact hits me that the beautiful Drow in front of me only has a thin piece of cloth loosly wrapped around her body. Right now, I try to recall the meditative training excercises Gorion had painstakingly taught me, but, not surprisingly , I can barely think straight. At this point I decide to say something. "Are... you taking... a, ahh, bath?"
'By the gods, that was so lame!' I think to myself... If I could have kicked myself in the head, I gladly would have done it.
"That would be obvious now, would it?" Viconia chuckles, obviously over my discomfort. She then steps in front of me and shoots me one of her patented sly grins. Without warning, Viconia loosens her robe and slowly lets it slip to the floor, leaving me to gaze upon her perfect body... The room suddenly seems a whole lot warmer than it was only a moment ago.
"Do you like what you see?" She grins as she notices my utter discomfort. Making matters even worse, she steps closer to me... With every inch she approaches, my discomfort grows by miles. 'Oh, gods... oh, gods... Karis, look her in the eyes, look her in the EYES.' With that I fight to keep my gaze from shifting downward, but then I notice she is really, really standing close to me now, our skins only a short way before contact... She bends her head slowly towards my ear and I shiver as I feel her long bone-white hair tickle my shoulder.
"So," She speaks, while I sense her warm breath brushing against my ear, "tell me... Have you ever been with a woman before?" I feel all the blood in my body flush towards my cheeks and swallow as I stammer a reply. "We-well, two years ago, th-there w-was a g-girl. The da-daughter of a visi-visiting mage, who st-st-stayed in C-Ca-Candlekeep for fo-four months..." Try as I might, due to the magnificant visage in front of me, I cannot remember her name, nor even what she looks like...
She then chuckles again. "So, this girl initated you into the pleasures of the flesh, and you have been without a lover since then...." I se Viconia's grin widen as she appears to think about my last statement. I can't help but shiver again. "Just remember, the experience will absolutely pale in comparision to that of a night with me..." She whispers softly in my ear. This time I can no longer fight it... I close my eyes and move to kiss her on the lips.
When I open my eyes, I notice that Viconia had coyly avoided my kiss. She chuckles again and moves away from me. "Perhaps another time, jaluk..." She chuckles, while walking back towards her room, making no move to pick up her dropped robe. Just before entering her room, she shoots back another look. "Now," She starts, "I will take a long, hot soak in a soapy bathtub." She blows me a kiss and chuckles once more, before disappearing inside her room. Without hestitation, I walk inside my own room, grab my glass of water on my nightstand and splashed it in my face... It didn't help much.
***
"Beregost? Are you certain?" Karis asked again, but Dynaheir's face was unreadable...
"I had thought my descriptions were obvious enough," Dynaheir replied blankly.
"Beregost..." Karis whispered to himself, "I'm going to tell Lord Belt I'm leaving immediately."
"Whoa there, Karis," Imoen spoke up, "I'm going with ya!"
"Imoen..." Karis told his sister sternly.
"No discussions! Vic's my friend too, and I'm not gonna let you leave by yourself! Someone with your... special heritage should not be on his own out there..."
Karis sighed. "Fine." He told her with a smile, knowing full well he could not have won this battle.
***
She's dying. I can feel the life flowing out of her body as I hold her in my arms. She bleeds from numerous wounds, she is barely conscious and her breathing is laboured.
We all have suffered greatly, but the tyrant, Sarevok, has been annihilated along with his cronies. The price was high. Yeslick lies dead and must be ressurrected. Minsc can barely stand, while Dynaheir and Imoen have sunk to the floor, exhausted. And Viconia... Brave Viconia is dying in my arms.
I barely notice my own wounds as I caress her beautiful face. She took out Angelo... All by herself, when Semaj and Sarevok had the rest of us pinned down at the entrance to the temple. Like a goddess of battle she kept on fighting until she had slain her enemy, only to fall to her own wounds moments later.
I talk to her... Words of comfort to keep her from losing consciousness, until we can find a way to escape this acursed place. Realizing this might be the last opportunity, I carefully pull her close to me and softly kiss her on the lips. I wonder if she is even conscious enough to notice it.
Just as our brief kiss ends, a small army of Flaming Fist soldiers and clerics, led by lord Belt storm into the temple... Relief soars through me as I see they have come her to aid us.
"Sarevok?" Lord Belt asks me, but I need not answer. His armor, an empty shell, lies on top of the crest of Bhaal, for all to see.
The clerics see to all my wounded friends and the body of Yeslick... They intend to take us back to the surface... Back to the light of the sun.
"Don't worry, brave lad," A helmite priest tells me as I reluctanty hand over the mortally wounded Drow female in his care, "We'll take care of her. And of all your friends."
As they take her with them, I feel Imoen's hand on my shoulder. She smiles at me... I smile back as we both realize our ordeal is finally over...
***
"We shalt meet up with thee later, my friends, when thee have talked with Viconia." Dynaheir told Karis and Imoen as they stood at the massive Drawbridge of Baldur's Gate. "We still have much to discuss concerning the prophecies of Alaundo."
"Not even the most despicable of Evil can keep Minsc and Boo and Dynaheir away from their friends!" Minsc replied enthusiastically.
"I'll be counting the days, Minsc," Karis laughed and shaked the ranger's large hand. "We will be back, count on it. And hopefully, Viconia will be with us when we return."
"Then it is agreed." Dynaheir stated. "We will meet thee here in a fortnight."
That said, Karis and Imoen waved there goodbyes to their dear friends, as they set forth to Beregost.
They would never arrive...
