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Laughing Pandemonium: Cat Got My Tongue 2


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#1 Guest_Reality-Helix_*

Posted 09 September 2005 - 03:29 PM

A last little bit before leaving for the weekend. Enjoy.


Kaza waited calmly until Kit had finished beating Nathan into a fuzzy pulp, watching the dawn arrive.

Light washed over an unfamiliar landscape, just barely illuminating huge objects that might have been buildings, if they hadn't seemed alive at the same time.

He pointedly ignored the sounds of squabbling and gave the air an experimental sniff. Oh, yes. He could smell so many things! If only he knew what they were, and how to sort them out.

He got to his paws, standing was difficult and walking an ordeal; no longer balanced laterally, he had to convince himself that, just because his head was level with the ground, it didn't mean that he was falling, or near to scraping his face off if he ran.

Once his new quadrapedal balance had settled into his mind, he sauntered over to the "children" as he thought of them, and separated them both with two powerful swats.

Since he was, by far the largest of the three, a hefty, chocolate Persian in fact, it took hardly any effort at all to bat the combatants apart.

Nathan, now a slightly shaggy, black shorthair with a gray ear, caught his balance instantly, but Kit, in the form of an attractive and plush tortiseshell tabby, rolled ears over tail until she crashed in to a wall.

She scrambled to her paws, mantled, and hissed.

"Kaza!" she exclaimed. "I wasn't finished!"

"Yes, you were." he stated."Who knows what other enemies are near? Did you plan to alert them all with a catfight?"

Kit sulked, ears low.

Kaza turned copper eyes to Nathan. "What do you know about this place?"

Nathan was licking his paw and using it to smooth his ears. Kaza flattened his whiskers, and made the cat equivilent of a throat clearing sound.

Nathan stopped what he was doing and stared at his paw with an nonplussed expression. The he flicked the exstremity, as if annoyed with it.

"Erm...Well, some people call this place Faerie. Changelings call it the Dreaming. It's a place where anything imaginable exists."

Kit interrupted. "In other words, it's insanely dangerous."

Nathan laid his ears back, then lifted them again.

"Just so. Since we are human, we can't step out again. We have to find a portal, some nexus where the two worlds coincide, in order to get out." He held up a paw to forstall Kits' questions. "Before you ask, no I don't know why we are cats, although I must say, if I found you on the street, I'd take you home with me anyday." His tail curled in the air. "I LOVE torties!"

The tip of Kits' tail twitched in agitation.

"Right!" he continued. "I also do not know if our bodies truly turned into cats or if our personalities have been transported, and our real bodies are lying in a park somewhere, like a pile of drunks. I do know that the Pasty Dough building is that way," he gestured with his head. "And that I am calling this misson, Officially Hosed. Let's go."

They all leapt to it, eager to get home, Kit dashing forward more eagerly than the rest-

-headlong into a wall.

Nate and Kaza screeched to a halt.

"What?" Nathan asked.

"I dunno." Kit said, shaking her head to clear it. She got her paws under her and tried to walk. Her steps were disjointed, shaky. She wobbled like she was dizzy. Then she seemed to gain her balance, hopped forward-

-and broadsided Nathan.

"Good grief Kitty, what's wrong?"

"Don't call me that!" She snapped. "I don't know what's wrong. Nothing is where I think it is! You'd think, as a cat, I'd have better perceptions, even if I am half-blind."

Nate nosed about her face. Yes, she was still blind in her right eye, the scar that marked it puckering her muzzle slightly.

"Your whiskers tickle." she complained.

"Ah." he said. "That is the problem. Seems our senses were only heightened to what our bodies would allow. We all have a sense of smell, so that was strengthened. I wear glasses, so I am only seeing what a normal person would see, not what a cat would see. I'll bet that Kaza, and your left eyes' vision is phenominal. But Kit, you are blind in your right eye. You can't use that eye, and so you can't use any sensory perceptions on the right side of your head." he rubbed his paw against the smooth right side of her face. "You are missing half your whiskers."

Kit rolled her eye. "Great!" she burst out. "Just great! The heck am I supposed to get home?"

"We'll walk on either side of you." Nate suggested. "That will keep you from walking headlong into things. We'll go slow. C'mon"

He took his place at her right side, Kaza stepped up to her left. Sand- wiched between them, she managed to walk, albeit not with out a great deal of stomped paws and tangled legs. Together, the began to make their way slowly home.



Aveeno watched the odd trio untill the turned a corner and were out of sight. The violet haired Pooka cocked his horned head to one side and wondered what that had all been about. Cats didn't usually act that way.

Like every other curiosity he had seen, Aveeno decided to get a closer look.





My friend once had a cat who got too close to the stove and singed off half his whiskers. The resulting clumsiness was hilarious but pitiable. Have a good weekend!




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