'This is going to be a riot!' Laska thought gleefully as she put her prank in motion. After an apparently dead-drunk Anomen had been dragged back to Laska's mansion by his feet, she had stripped the clothes from his upper body and put him in her bed. Making a mental note to ask Lasalla to replace her bedlinnen in the morning, she had left the room and spent a few hours sleeping on the couch.

Now, with Anomen still snoring, she was ready to continue. Smiling to herself, she swiftly removed her vest and lay down beside the snoring helmite. Chuckling to herself, she nudged the sleeping Anomen awake. "Hey! Hey, you! Wake up!" she said.

The sleeping Helmite stirred, groaned, covered his eyes with his arm and generally complained about being woken up. Then, to Laska's glee, he noticed he was not where he had expected to be. Slightly startled, the Helmite slightly rose from the pillow only to drop back on it after noticing the topless elf lying next to him.

"So, awake yet?" Laska purred. "It's time for you to leave..."

"Wha.. who... We... Did we..." Anomen stammered, his eyes constantly and involuntarily darting from Laska's face to her bare chest and back again.

"Yes," Laska snickered inwardly. "I guess we both had a little too much to drink last night. Well, no matter," she said while wrapping a sheet around her body and stepping off the bed. "It's time for you to leave anyway..."

"But...we... I... we spent..." Anomen stammered.

"Well, yes..." Laska chuckled. "What of it?"

"WE MUST GET MARRIED!" Anomen exclaimed.

"To you?" Laska chuckled. "No offence, but I'd rather cut off my own ears with a rusty bread knife..."

"But we..." Anomen added.

"Yes, we have. So what?" Laska added. "No skin of my nose, but I just don't want you hanging around here..."

"The sheer depravity!" Anomen sighed.

"Oh, come on!" Laska chuckled. "You weren't THAT good. One a scale of one to ten, I'd give it a meager two for depravity... Come on, don't tell me you haven't fantasized about it when we met the first time..."

Anomen fell silent, apparently sinking into deep thoughts. Laska, in the meantime, could barely contain her sadistic laughter. Her prank was going great!

"Per... Perhaps..." Anomen spoke, more calm than he had been before. "Perhaps this... isn't so bad..."

"Ey?" Laska replied and shifted to sit back on the bed, surprised that the expected temper tantrum did not come.

"Ever since I first... observe your beauty from the Order Guildhouse I have been..."

"I really don't want to hear this!" Laska all but snarled and clutched the sheet a little tighter to her bare chest.

"What I mean to say is that," Anomen spoke. "Despite my objections to your demeanor, your character and your morals, I have been imagining what is would be like to hold you in my arms and whisper sweet words of love in your delicately pointed ears..."

"Eehhh... oh," Laska said, horrified at seeing her mean prank backfire... right in her face.

"It.. it... it was just a joke!" Laska retorted and stepped away from the bed, ever backing away from the suddenly love-stuck helmite.

"It is my regret that the many drinks have obscured the memory of the night we spend together," Anomen replied, blushing slightly.

"What do you mean 'many drinks'?" Laska retorted. "You passed about after half a cup of cider!"

"Nevertheless, my Lady..."

"Don't CALL ME THAT!" Laska screeched. "And... and we didn't do anything! We both still have our pants on!"

"My Lady," Anomen continued unfettered as he lifted his muscular frame out of Laska's bed. "What I mean to ask you is," he said with a certain amount of nervousness, "would you allow me the honor of wooing you?"

"Eep," was Laska's single, frightened reply. She felt all the blood rush from her face as the (reluctant) admittedly handsome man regarded her with anticipation.

"You need only give the word," Anomen spoke with rare humility, "and this humble servant of Helm shall lay the world at your feet."

"It's fine where it is!" Laska retorted and made for the door, dropping the sheet in the process.

"My Lady, wait!" Anomen spoke as his would-be elven lover sped out the door. Making every effort to follow her as quickly as possible. As he stepped through the door he whipped his head around, trying to figure out where she had gone off too, but the last thing he would see this morning was a gray-skinned fist slamming into his jaw. Briefly wandering just what the hell had happened before darkness overcame his senses, he dropped to the floor like a sack of potatoes.

Panting with a mixture of satisfaction and nervousness, Laska stood over the prone form of Anomen, trying to figure out her next step.

"Well, you've handled that with style and finesse," she heard the voice of Viconia mock her from behind. Turning around, she saw Viconia standing in the doorway to her Drow, wearing a mocking smile while she ran a soft brush through her long white hair. To Laska, it seemed odd that she was fully battle-ready. She was wearing her enchanted chainmail and her new Flail of Ages was attached to her new weaponbelt around her slender waist. Usually, she was not as active this early in the morning.

"Tell me about it," Laska sighed.

"Busy night?" Viconia chuckled.

"With him? Hardly!" Laska retorted sharply. "My wonderfully crafted prank to get him all steamed up and angry kinda backfired!"

"How so?" Viconia smirked.

"He wants to," Laska shuddered briefly, "woo me..."

"You poor thing," Viconia laughed mockingly.

"Thank you for the sympathy! You're supposed to be my abbil, you know?" Laska shot back.

"Anyway, here he is lying on the ground," Viconia replied. "Whatever are you going to do with him now?"

"I'm gonna toss him in the dumpster, I think..." Laska replied. "I just have to drag him over to the dumpster of the Temple of Talos across the street."

"Across the street?" Viconia asked. "Why bother?"

"I don't want him to know where I live!" Laska said, and started to drag Anomen towards the door by the boots.

"I think he already has a pretty good idea where you live," Viconia smirked.

"Well, I could put him in a burlap sack with some stones, tie it shut and toss it in the river?" Laska muttered. "Oh, wait... That's an evil thing to do, right?"

"It's... on the evil side," Viconia agreed. "Look, why don't you just whip him into submission, like I always did with my lovers! It can be handy to have someone around to lick your boots clean when you come home."

"If I want someone to lick my boots, I'll buy a puppy!" Laska chuckled, dropping Anomen's boots to the floor in an unceremonious fashion. "I don't need Helmite saliva anywhere near me!"

"Well, after you dispose of this fool, you must join me for a while," Viconia replied. "As I mentioned I have discovered a means to save Dynaheir's soul, in mind and body. I am about to put my plan in motion..." Viconia replied in all seriousness. "I want you to come along."

"Oh?" Laska replied and put her hands on her hips. "I'm always happy to help a friend, and I feel I owe Dynaheir much. Tell me, what's my task in your master plan, oh great drowy thinker?"

"Basically, you wave your sword around..." Viconia replied.

"Hey, I can do that!" Laska chuckled. "But shouldn't we bring the others?"

"No," Viconia spoke grimly. "You saw what happened to Minsc last time we met the vampiric Dynaheir, so having him around is not a good idea. Korgan is to crude to deal with such a delicate matter, while Jan is simply too chatty for a stealth operation such as this. And Keldorn, well, as much as we have come to accept each other, I do not yet trust him not to slay Dynaheir the moment he sees her, and then she will be lost forever. Beside the fact that we are two elves capable of stealth and the fact that there's only two of us will make my plan easier to follow..."

"Great!" Laska said. "Errr, wait a minute. That means I'm the dumb broad with the big swords that takes on all the baddies to keep them off the back of the smart cleric casting rites and doing bugger all to help the dumb broad fight the enemies?"

"Exactly!" Viconia chuckled.

"It's a cracker, I'm on!" Laska chuckled.

*'Ugh!'* was shouted from the umbrella stand were Ipsiya had been put in. *'More Violence. That means you'll be sliding me through greasy undead once more! Sometimes I wish you were a little less violent...'*

"Ip, you're a sword," Laska replied. "Violence is your raison d'etre."

*'I know that, but could you at least find some non-greasy, non-dirty, non-rotting enemies for a change? I am a lady, you know!'* Ipsiya huffed.

"So," Laska said, ignoring the sword. "That's settled. But how do you plan on actually finding her? It's a big city out there... And what if she's at the Graveyard? In the camp of that other vampire, I mean. What was her name again? Broad-theigh?"

"I have considered that, but I do not believe she resides there," Viconia smiled and sat down at the dining table, motioning Laska to join her. "You see, it's hardly a secret that the Shadow Thieves are at war with some sort of vampire-cult, led by this Bodhi. She's grown quite powerful and has her mind set on controlling the entire nation of Amn for reasons unknown. The Shadow thieves are fighting her, but are taking heavy losses..."

"How do you know this?" Laska asked.

"I asked Jan to have his family members ask around and report back to me," Viconia smiled and tapped her fingers on the hardwood table. "Say about the Jansens what you will, but they are a very valuable resource of information."

"But why do you think Dynaheir isn't located at the Graveyard with the rest of the vampires?" Laska asked, putting her elbows in the table and supporting her head with her hands.

"Undoubtedly, the shadow thieves know of their main staging grounds as well, and have the graveyard constantly watched. But despite of this, the shadow thieves are being hit hardest by surprise attacks which means..."

"They have smalls nests hidden in the city!" Laska finished, snapping his fingers.

"Indeed," Viconia confirmed. "That's why we need to visit Gaelen Bayle to ask him for a complete account of all the attacks on the shadow thieves in the last few weeks. Edwardo Jansen has confirmed the vampiric Dynaheir is the leader of these assaults..."

"Why should he help us?" Laska asked. "He didn't help us find Imoen yet either..."

"Well," Viconia replied, "he'd be a fool not to help us rid him of one of his greatest enemies. And if he demands a price I shall allow him to bed you..."

"WHAT?!" Laska replied. "I've already been traumatized once today, thank you very much!"

"Don't worry," Viconia chuckled. "I was merely jesting... Speaking of which, get rid of that fool so we can get going..."

"Right!" Laska said, filled grim determination as she strolled to the front door to get rid of the unconscious helmite.

"Laska?" Viconia asked as the tattooed elf opened the door. "You might want to put your vest back on before you leave. A female's chest, and a naked female's chest especially, is a magnet to all those sexually repressed knights wandering the city looking for the damsel in distress with the biggest bosom..."

"And considering the fact that we live next door to a knight's guildhouse..." Laska said, biting her lip as she grabbed her vest and fastened it around her upper body.

"It's better not to provoke it," Viconia said. "Not that is matters much, I would think. That vest of yours is so revealing and low-cut it has perhaps even a deeper effect on the weak male minds either way."

"It does show of my new tattoo nicely," Laska smiled.

"That tracing of a rose?" Viconia asked, referring to the small tattoo of a black rose on the right slope of Laska's left breast.

"Yep," Laska sighed, "it hurt like hell to have it put on, though..."

"I get the feeling," Laska grunted as she lived a huge metal ring from the table and held it in her arms while Viconia folded the Bag of Holding over it, "you wanted me to come along to act as a pack-mule as well."

"I got it," Viconia said as it lowered into the Bag of Holding.

The two elves had arrived at the famed Cromwell smithy at the docks. The legendary dwarven master of the forge had assisted Viconia with the creation of a magical device that she had been researching ever since she had made a breakthrough in her reading into all things vampirical. The device was a large copper ring, engraved with the symbols of Tyr, Mystra and Tymora. It was roughly two and a half meters in diameter, and very, very heavy. Apart from the ring, there were a number of three ornate silver mirrors, small enough to hold in one's hand.

"Ye be certain this thing can cure a blood-sucker?" Cromwell, a gruff and ancient dwarf, his beard long and gray, asked with a deep, cackling voice.

"We've been working hard and long enough on it," Viconia replied, thinking back how hard it was for her, being a Drow to even open a dialog with Cromwell. Still, the ancient dwarf had been honest and treated her with respect, even in his initial distrust. In return, Viconia respected him in turn, creating a proper environment so both could work comfortably.

"What does this thing do? How does it work?" Laska asked.

"Ach," Cromwell replied. "I be mannin' the forge, and Viconia 'ere be prayin' to the gods and castin' spells ta complete the bloody thing..."

"That true," Viconia said. "I was surprised when Tymora was the first to answer my prayers. She did immediately, in fact, and her powers are needed for the device to work. The next to answer was Mystra, quite eager to help save one of her servants. Tyr required more work, though. It took me almost all night to contact him, and only after a personally directed prayer concerning class-justice did he answer me..."

"Aye, it be yer funeral if ye be usin' this thing," Cromwell sighed.

"No matter," Viconia said, handing the dwarf a bag of gold, "you've done your job and you did it well..."

"Nay, nay," Cromwell spoke, refusing the gold. "I cannay in good conscience take yer gold. Ye pay me when ye know fer certain it be workin'."

"Fair enough," Viconia replied and put the coins back in her pouch.

"Aye," Cromwell said. "Well, good luck to ye two lasses then. Oh, and when ye be seein' Korgan again, ye be tellin' 'im to sit on a pike!"

"This is place is so annoying!" Laska said as she and Viconia entered the Gem district, home of the Amnian nouveau-riche. It was called the 'gem-district' for a good reason : All the houses in this seemingly large district were ornated with an incredible amount of multi-colored and shiny gems, and apparently it was a symbol of status to have the most gems of the most colors chiseled in the walls of their homes. The streets were quiet, it was yet too early for most people to be up. The streets were wide and suprisingly clean. Not a single soul was in sight.

"I know what you mean," Viconia muttered. "This flaunting of one's own wealth is so childish..."

"Oh, no," Laska muttered as she felt a raindrop land on the top of her head. "It's starting to rain..." she said as she noticed the black clouds obscuring the dusky sunlight.

"The nest must be around here somewhere," Viconia said.

"How do you know?" Laska asked.

"Remember the map Gaelen Bayle showed us?" Viconia asked as drizzle turned into a slight spatter.

"No," Laska chuckled. "I was too overjoyed I didn't have to sleep with him."

"Well, this map," Viconia said as she and Laska set down on a small bench on front of a small park in the middle of a round-about, "had all the attacks labeled with small flags. And the gem district lay in the center of all attacks. Considering Dynaheir's very structured way of thinking, this is a good place to start."

"Okay, so why didn't the shadow thieves found it yet?" Laska asked.

"They've sent parties of thieves in the gem district and none have ever returned. A good sign, isn't it?" Viconia smiled.

Laska adjusted her chainmail and directed her attention to the Drow sitting next to her. "And there's only two of us how do you expect us to..." Laska said, but when the Drow grinned at her, the realization hit her... "Oh, no... NO!" Laska retorted.

"We just have to walk around until you get nauseous," Viconia smiled.

As the search continued, lighting shot over their heads as the rain poured from the sky. Soon enough, the rainfall was of the same level as it had been several weeks ago. A density of fog and rain so thick, it was impossible to even a few feet ahead. In the middle of this rainstorm, two elves, soaking wet, were still searching for the nest of vampires.

Laska was strolling randomly across the streets and past all the houses, but she was not having much luck. Viconia, in the meantime, had taken off her helmet to avoid getting hit by a bolt of lighting and was looking at the sky at rather annoyed fashion.

"Hold on!" Laska suddenly spoke up and stopped dead in her tracks. "I felt something..."

"It's not your stomach again, is it?" Viconia chuckled.

"Hey, I can't help it that you dragged me away from the house before Lasalla could wake up and fix me breakfast," Laska retorted. She fell silent and turned towards the source of the feeling that affected her in the very pit of her stomach. "Oh, yeah," she said as she took a few more steps. "It's definitely here," she said, getting more pale with every step. "Right here!" she stamped her foot as she looked about to throw up.

"Underground," Viconia sighed as she noticed they were standing in the middle of the street.

Water trinkled, leaked and poured through the grates on the surface across the walls into the small canals of the Gem District's sewer-system. The smell of the sewers was negated by the constant pour of water. The stones were slippery, and even the two elves had trouble keeping their balance. Deeper and deeper they continued their path though the sewers, following Laska's overdeveloped moon elven instinctive undead detector. Eventually, they came to a dry section in the sewers, which was apparently build onto a large higher dias, perhaps meant as an office for the sewer-workers.

Immediately, Viconia and Laska hid behind a large pipe as Laska took note of two skeleton warriors patrolling the dias. Fighting to keep herself from wretching at the proximity of the two warriors, Laska kept her hands clasped over her mouth. She gathered that these skeleton warriors were even more powerful than the regular skeleton warriors they normally encountered...

In the meantime, Viconia was silently praying while the patrolling skeletons drew ever nearer. ".... CREDIOS!" she shouted as she rose from the floor and confronted the skeletons. Power crackled through the moist air as the energies from the negative material plane were ripped from existence. One skeleton tumbled and fell apart, while the other was left severely damaged.

Laska didn't hesitate. She drew Ipsiya and used the blue flaming moonblade to sever the skull from the neck of the surviving skeleton. Almost immediately, as the negative energy faded, Laska's nausea decreased significantly. "Well," she said. "It seems we've found the nest..."

"Dammit!" Viconia exclaimed as she examined the door leading into the nest. "I did not anticipate this!"

"What?" Laska asked as she picked up some of the bones from the floor.

"A magical door!" Viconia snarled. "I don't think we can get through this without the proper key..."

"Just bash it, then," Laska said as she put some of the bones on a small ledge.

"A solid granite door?" Viconia sighed.

But Laska didn't hear her. She was gleefully holding the skull in her hands. "Not so tough now are you?" she chuckled and started to sing in a haunting, yet jovial voice. "The head-bone's connected to the... rib-bone. The rib-bone's connected to the... leg-bone. The leg-bone's connected to the... ankle-bone. And that's the way that it goes..."

"Will you STOP doing that?" Viconia snarled in frustration as ran her hands over the magical runes. "I need to think!"

"The ankle-bone's connected to the... back-bone. The back-bone's connected to the... hip-bone. The hip-bone's connected to the... hand-bone..."

"Hand-bone?" Viconia asked herself.

"And that's the way that it... HEY!" Laska shouted as Viconia took the skeletal hand away, making her sculpture of bones collapse. "I was making a freak of bones!"

"Pity," Viconia said and pressed the skeletal head in an inlet in the middle of the door. Immediately, the solid granite door shimmered, and slowly faded into non-existence. Immediately, Laska was overcome with a wave of extreme nausea. Immediately, Laska's freak of bones crashed to the floor as she sank to her knees, silently wretching.

"Here," Viconia said gently as a blue light descended over the tattooed elf, "this will help..."

"Wh.. what did you do?" Laska asked as she felt most of her nausea drain away.

"It was a spell that Shar recently granted me," Viconia replied and helped her friend to her feet. "Negative Plane Protection. It should protect you from powers of the vampires within the nest..."

"Well, why the bloody hell didn't you cast it on me BEFORE!" Laska all but snarled.

"Its power is finite, and may not even last through the entire upcoming battle," Viconia replied. "So I suggest we get back to our plan..."

Laska and Viconia entered the small makeshift crypt with a certain amount of denied nervousness. It was a small, sparsely decorated, earth-dark crypt. Several stone caskets lined each of the four walls, and a single, larger golden sarcophagus was situated in a slightly lowered inclination in the floor.

Viconia motioned Laska to help her remove the lid from the golden sarcophagus. They had to know for sure...

The lid was slowly and silently moved to the side of the sarcophagus, and there she was : Dynaheir. Lying lifeless in the casket with her arms crossed. In this state, she almost looked like her old self, save for the occasional glimpse of two large fangs in her mouth whenever she curled up her upper lip. Viconia nodded and helped Laska replace the lid.

"We're in luck," Viconia whispered while she fastened the mirrors in a position of an isosceles triangle around Dynaheir's sarcophagus. "She's just fed. Vampires need a moment to assimilate the blood they have drunk the night before, meaning she won't be quick to awaken and will not be at her strongest when she does wake up. Now, we must lay the ring over the sarcophagus and we can begin. Just keep the vampires off my back until I have cast the final rite..."

"One ring, coming up!" Laska said, and swung the Bag of Holding over the sarcophagus.

"Laska, NO!" Viconia shouted, but to no avail. The heavy copper ring was flung from the Bag and landed firmly in its intended spot... with an earth-shattering crash. Immediately, Viconia started casting, hoping she would finish the first incantation before Dynaheir would awaken. All around them, from the other caskets, four vampire enforcers emerged. Drawing her weapons, Laska gritted her teeth and prepared to guard Viconia from harm, and more importantly, being disturbed while casting.

The lid of the golden sarcophagus flew through the air as Dynaheir arose. Directing her ire on the Drow kneeled at her casket, she let out a shrill snarl. Just as she stepped to Viconia, intending to sink her fangs into her tender neck, the Drow finished the spell. The ring glowed briefly, capturing Dynaheir in a magical field. In the background, Laska slashed Ipsiya through the throat of one of the vampire enforcers, while Viconia quickly started the second incantation.

Laska grimaced in pain as the claws of a male vampire raked her arm. Turning to engage her attacker, she was disgusted when she noticed the same vampire gleefully licking her blood from his fingers. But as it turned out, no revenge was needed. Three beams of colored shot from the mirrors and accumulated at the ring, capturing the writhing Dynaheir in a bright beam of light, illuminating the crypt and turning the vampires in the room into dust instantly.

A few, agonizing moments later, Viconia continued her incantation with grim determination, taking only a moment to wipe the sweat from her forehead. As she finished, a bright mist emerged from all three mirrors, which gathered inside the beam and whirled around the vampire's body... Dynaheir's soul re-entered her vessel, and expunged a dark, arid smoke from it. Only seconds later, the beam of light faded, and Dynaheir fell into the casket...

"Och, bloody blasted bleedin' rain," Korgan muttered as he glanced out the window next to the front door of Laska's estate. "I 'ate it! I 'ate bein' wet! Me beard be gettin' all soggy..."

"It is merely the weather, Korgan," Keldorn responded. "So, you are certain you do not know where Laska and Viconia have gone to? I have an important matter to discuss with them and you..."

"Boo says you might as well tell us," Minsc said. "So we can tell them when they come back..."

"If you insist," Keldorn said as he set himself at the table. "But I am not sure you are going to like it, since it concerns the squire An..."

Before Keldorn could finish his sentence the front door flew open, and two elves entered, grinning like cheshire cats... Very, very, very wet cheshire cats. Laska seemed to be carrying a dark-skinned human woman wearing tattered clothing.

"Ah, Boo..." Minsc managed while he stared and stammered at the sleeping body of his charge. Then, he fainted and crashed to the floor.