Cards Reshuffled

Appearances are not everything, and they may deceive and trick you. Do not think that the seemingly calm and collected cannot be torn inside, that they do not weep in the lonely night. And do not presume that the one who sobs the loudest is the one who mourns the most – or at all.

Excerpt from ‘Ruminations Of A Master Bard’

The world had ended, and yet she was going on, going through the motions, trying to pretend that she was still alive. She had no choice. I promised…I swore to Gorion that I would protect those two girls as if they were my own. And I will. Whether they think they need it or not.

She had never had children of her own. At first she hadn’t wanted to, she had been too caught up in other things, in saving the world, in serving the balance. Then, years later, he had brought it up again, and she had looked within herself and known that the balance had shifted. I can change my mind, if I deem it necessary. He always knew that.

They had agreed then, that it would soon be time for them to bring more life into the world. Soon. Except there were so many things to do, duties to be carried out, missions to be accomplished. There was always just one more innocent life to save, just one more villain to defeat. Just one more. And so time had passed. Time. We thought we had plenty of time left. Years and years and years. And suddenly the time had run out.

It should have been just this one final quest. Protect Gorion’s wards, and then, a child of their own. She could almost see the infant now, smiling at her, its eyes innocent and full of trust and love. Fading away. That child would never come to be. It had been stolen from her, as had he. Khalid, heart of my heart. How I miss you.

Jaheira carefully shifted the grip on the lightly enchanted quarterstaff she was carrying, her green eyes staring into the distance as she prepared to follow the rest of the group through a portal leading deeper into Kalah’s Circus of Illusions. She hardly saw them. She saw a kind face, with a gentle smile and loving eyes, the usual nervousness missing as he bent to kiss her. Khalid. Why you? Why not me? You used to jest and say that you loved me enough to follow me even into Death itself. Now you have gone before me, and yet I cannot follow. The children need me still. Not our child, the one who will never be, but our children whom we both love. I cannot leave them. Not yet. Will you forgive me, Mela en’ coiamin, love of my life? I pray that you will, every time I lie down for sleep that will not come. I pray that you will forgive me for everything.

The druid hurriedly rubbed her hand across her eyes, hoping to wipe her deep weariness away before the others could notice it. She was the elder here, she felt responsible. She could not afford this weakness, not now. Blast that Minsc! This is a worthy cause to be certain, but we are not ready. We rushed into this place blindly, unprepared, and we know nothing of what dangers lie ahead. And of the five of us, two are strangers still.

Yoshimo seemed competent enough, for all his flippancy, but he was an unknown factor. They knew absolutely nothing about him except for his profession as bounty hunter, his eastern origins, and that he so far seemed content to follow Zaerini’s lead. But who knows what he really thinks behind that smiling face?

Then there was Aerie. The Avariel seemed eager to please. A little too eager, perhaps. But maybe that is not so surprising. Those with little strength tend to seek it out in others, for their own protection. We will have to see though; she may be stronger than she appears at first glance. I wish Minsc would stop fussing over her so, however. How does he expect her to learn if he will not leave her side? Zaerini should have a word with him about that, I must remember to speak to her about it.

Jaheira turned her eyes to her fellow half-elf. She was deeply concerned about the bard. Zaerini might think she was recovered from her ordeal in Irenicus’ dungeon, but she clearly was not. She was trying to seem her old self, but there was a feverish glint in her golden eyes and a brittleness to her smiles. The child wants to be brave, but she should know that she cannot press herself too far. It was only yesterday that we…lost Imoen. She needs more rest, not to run about chasing after crazy wizards with delusions of grandeur.

That reminded Jaheira of something else, or rather of someone else, and her mouth tightened a little. That bastard of a Red Wizard really broke the child’s heart. She still misses him, despite everything, I can tell. If I ever run into him again, I will make him pay for the tears she shed for his sake. And what makes it even worse is that in some odd and utterly insane way he managed to make me like him after a fashion! I thought he would be good for her, and instead he hurt her. Yes, should I ever come across him I will make him enter the natural balance properly. As compost. He can join the…the other wizard. Irenicus.

Jaheira was only vaguely aware of entering a new room, another dark and circular chamber with multicolored light dancing across the white marble floor. She was trembling quietly with hatred. Irenicus. We will find Imoen and free her, then we will find him. And then I will make him regret even thinking of touching my Khalid. That I swear. She kept focusing on her burning hatred. It helped, just a little bit. It kept her from dwelling on that room, and that table, and those neat little jars with their neat little labels. I dare not cry. Not now, or I may not be able to stop. But inside, inside my soul is bleeding, though my cheeks remain dry. Khalid…

“Ah, my beast, you have led them here nicely...” Jaheira was suddenly jerked back into the present at the sound of a gloating male voice somewhere ahead. A large shape emerged from the shadows, a hulking figure towering far above the adventurers. Somewhere behind her she could Aerie gasp and Yoshimo utter an unfamiliar word the approximate meaning of which she could guess. That would be Kalah.

Aerie had described the illusionist as a gnome, and not a very large gnome at that. Yet this being was enormous, easily as large as Sarevok had been, with a heavily muscled body, a bald head and a tusked face dominated by a pair of malevolent orange eyes. I suppose it makes sense. If this gnome was mocked for his small size, he would want to make himself bigger, given the power to do so.

“Kalah?” Aerie hastily said, clasping her hand across her mouth in dismay. “What…I’m not…”

The monstrous wizard laughed. “You're not what? You're not my beast? Oh, but you are, all of you are, don't you see? Do you think I don’t know? That I don’t see? When I was given the power I saw, I saw everything. I know you, my beast. I know you all.”

Aerie shook her head violently, making her long hair whip across her face, obscuring it for a moment. “No…you…” Then she spotted something on the floor some distance away, and her voice rose to a scream as her arm shot out, pointing. “What…what is that?! Is that…wh-what have you done to my Uncle Quayle?”

Jaheira looked in that direction, spotting something on the floor. It looked almost like a garbage heap at first, but then she saw it moving, shifting about. A slime of some sort?

Kalah grinned, clearly happy to change the subject for now. “I have been playing with him a little, the spineless old wretch. Made him change his ways. Don’t tell me you don’t like it, my beast.”

“Little Aerie?” the large blob of slime suddenly said, a mouth forming along its side. “I have no eyes, no eyes!”

“Shut up, you!” Kalah growled, waving his hand in the slime’s direction. “You can do without a mouth as well, miserable fool. You never knew, did you? Never saw. But I do. Oh, I do…” The mouth disappeared and the slime trembled, thrashing about as if in pain, but silently.

He tries to scream, Jaheira thought, her mind filled with the horror of it. He tries to scream, but has no mouth.

“Enough!” Kalah shouted. “I need you no longer, not now when the power is mine! It’s a regular three-ring circus, isn't it, my beasts... Now go ahead and tear each other apart!”

A swarm of shadows silently glided towards the adventurers, as two more werewolves winked into existence, snarling as they charged. “Kalah!” Zaerini shouted. “Concentrate on him, he is the one giving these beasts power!” She immediately followed her own advice, chanting a spell, and a bolt of bright flame streaked out from her palm, striking the enemy wizard with an unpleasant hissing sound.

Kalah gasped with pain, but quickly retaliated. Magic Missiles flew from his hands, buzzing little orbs of death. A couple of them struck Yoshimo, who doubled over with the shock of it, and Jaheira was forced to move in front of the rogue, quarterstaff whirling to protect him from the assault of the shadows. One of them raked her across her arm, its sharp claws sending icy pain all the way along her arm and into her body. The staff was growing heavier in her hands, she was uncertain how much longer she would be able to go on. The shadows sap my strength! They…they might…no! I will not fall! Not here! Not when the children need me. She struck, again and again, her aching muscles shuddering, and the shadow dissipated into a formless black blob with a piercing scream.

As Jaheira turned to the next shadow, Yoshimo had recovered enough to stand his ground next to her, wielding his katana with grim efficiency. Out of the corner of her eye she was vaguely aware of Minsc rushing Kalah, the Sword of Chaos in hand and shouting some outrageous Rashemani battlecry, whereas Zaerini kept pelting the illusionist with what offensive spells she had left. Where is that miserable Avariel? If she is going to let us fight this battle on our own…

But Aerie had not been idle. Swiftly moving her hands in a complicated pattern she chanted a spell, her voice far too low to be heard by anybody except herself, and the two illusionary werewolves disappeared in a flash of light, just as their fellows before them. The Avariel’s rosebud mouth arched upwards in a small and triumphant smile, but Jaheira didn’t have the time to pay much attention to her, as she was still engaged in a life and death struggle with the remaining shadows.

As her back was turned at the moment, Jaheira did not see which blow it was that felled Kalah. All she was aware of was a sudden bloodcurdling scream, and then the world lurched around her, spinning and twisting. Marble and shadows, magic and illusion, they all winked out, leaving behind a fairly small and dingy circus tent, with sawdust on the ground, and uncomfortable-looking wooden benches. Several people in brightly colored tights, presumably performers, were uncertainly milling about in the ring, trying to figure out where they were and what had happened to them. And in the middle of the ring, the small figure of a gnome lay, his breath labored and his face gray with approaching death.

“No!” Kalah exclaimed in a tiny voice resembling that of a gnat. He coughed violently. “This isn't what was supposed to happen! This isn't what was promised to me! I have...planned this for...too long only to have my plans shattered by some inbred, northern adventurers! I...I just wanted to be respected... You've...you've killed me... destroyed Kalah with your misplaced morals and beastly greed for adventure...”

Zaerini was closest and was bending down over the gnome, peering intently into his face as she tried to catch his dying words. “Promised? What was promised? And by whom?”

Kalah opened his mouth as if to say something, but at precisely that moment Aerie screamed, a piercing wail like that of a stricken bird, and threw herself to the floor, tears streaming down her face. “Uncle Quayle! Oh no!” The slime had disappeared, and now a small and crumpled form could be seen in its stead, a large and still smoking hole burned through its chest where the heart had once been. The dead gnome’s face still held a look of vast surprise. “Uncle…Uncle Quayle is d-dead!” Aerie sobbed, hugging the corpse to her. “Oh no…what…what w-will I do now? I will be all…all alone!” She gently lay the corpse down and then buried her face in her hands, still sobbing.

“Poor Aerie must not be left alone!” Minsc said, patting the elf on the head. “She must come with us, and help kick evil butts!”

“I…I w-would like that!” Aerie said, smiling shyly through her tears. “But…but only if you all w-wish me to. I wouldn’t want to…to be a b-bother, with my…my grief. But if…if you’re sure, I’ll do my best. Don’t…don’t m-mind me though. I’m sure I can manage somehow.”

“Ah, another proof of a noble heart,” Yoshimo blandly said, sheathing his katana. “She is a rarity, this little one.”

Aerie frowned, as if uncertain what he was saying, but then she smiled nervously again.

Jaheira turned to see Zaerini looking at her, and they exchanged a long look. That elf is like a bird fallen out of its nest, Jaheira thought. Or perhaps like a newly hatched one. Frail, and constantly screaming for attention. But what will work for a hatchling will not work on the road, and we cannot spend our efforts stuffing worms into her beak. Still, she did fight. She must be stronger than she seems, else how could she possibly have survived?

Zaerini seemed to have come to some similar decision. “You can come with us for now,” she told Aerie. “But understand that I make no promises about for how long. I’m sorry about Quayle, by the way. I didn’t know him well, but I know what it’s like to grieve.”

“Thank you,” Aerie said, her blue eyes once again brimming with tears. “Poor Uncle Quayle…he was always s-so good to me. I’m sure you wouldn’t have let K-Kalah kill him if…if you could help it.”

Jaheira startled, suddenly reminded of the illusionist. As she turned around, she saw Kalah’s corpse and inwardly cursed herself for letting herself get distracted by the emotional Avariel. Now Kalah would never pass on his secret. An unfortunate mistake. I hope it will not prove to be a fatal one. Khalid…please help me. Please help me keep my sorrow in check, and help me use my strength to protect the children.

As the adventurers spoke with the woman Hannah, now happily restored to her normal form from that of a spider, Aerie hung back a little. Looking from the sad corpse of Quayle to that of Kalah, a small smile briefly tugged at the corners of her mouth, unnoticed by her companions. There was much they hadn’t noticed. Like how she had used the chaos and confusion of the battle to slay Quayle before the gnome could say anything that would raise suspicion about his new and improved personality, or about Aerie herself. The look on his face had been absolutely priceless, and now her secrets were safe again. The same went for Kalah. For a moment she had been very much afraid that he would have the time to blab about their partnership, but everything had worked according to plan.

Fools. Since when did wailing and moaning equal grief? But just make it loud enough, and these young ones will swallow anything. Like the makeup of the theatre, it has to be very bright and ostentatious, or people will not believe in it. And now the real games may begin. The Avariel schooled her face into an expression of sad bravery, and followed her new companions out of the circus tent, making her steps as shy and hesitant as only she knew how. Good riddance, Kalah. And bye-bye ‘Uncle Quayle’.